RealTouch Gets Realer

RealTouch InteractiveRemember RealTouch, the male masturbation aid that allegedly feels about as close to actual vaginal penetration as current technologies can offer? Well, it may have impressed you back when it was first announced in 2008, but RealTouch just got a whole lot realer. The latest evolution of the device has been dubbed RealTouch Interactive and it gives the sleeve in which you nervously insert your penis a partner in carnal thrills: RealTouch JoyStick. But what does this allegedly interactivity entail? Couldn’t it be said that the original RealTouch, which reacted to the onscreen movements of your chosen RealTouch pornstar to provide you with a simulated sexual experience with that very woman, was also interactive? In short, dear readers, what gives?

RealTouch Interactive uses the RealTouch sleeve device and a partnered joystick to simulate the physical act of penetrative sex not with a pornstar, but with a real live woman. It works thanks to the miracle of “haptic technology” (whatever that is) and, for example, can provide long-distance couples with a way to keep the flames of passion alive while being out of reach. The woman takes in her hand the JoyStick controller and strokes it in whatever way she sees fit. The guy, on the other hand, seems to have little to do but sit back and let his partner work her manual magic. Man, isn’t this exactly what we’ve all been dreaming about since the very first time we heard about that thing called “virtual reality”?

RealTouch Interactive is currently in beta testing and participation is reserved for those who already own a RealTouch and are members of the RealTouch Network. What those folks who apply and are chosen to participate can expect is a little unclear at the moment. It does appear, though, that RealTouch Interactive can currently only be used, and possibly will only ever be used, for indirect simultaneous physical pleasure bestowed upon the lucky guy by a webcam model. Bummer, dude.

Still, what a world, eh? Who would’ve thought that such an ingenious sexual aid would arrive this early into the 21st Century? Certainly not all those guys out there making do with various homemade masturbation aids like a ziplock back inside a tightly wrapped towel, a toilet paper tube with a wet dish cloth stuffed inside, or, shit, even that well worn hole in the back of their favorite sofa cushion. If only these guys could get in on the RealTouch Interactive beta testing crew and let all of us eager beaverless brothers know how thrilling this latest and greatest virtual sex experience actually feels.

(And, yes, I’m still waiting for RealTouch to throw a porn reviewer a complimentary bone, or, more accurately, somewhere high-tech to shove mine.)

The Chubbiest Show in Vegas

BBW FanFestCome July, chubby chasers can finally relax a little because the greatest BBW performers in adult entertainment will all be gathered in one convenient location: BBW FanFest 2012. The invited plump and sexy plus-sized performers, which include Kelly Shibari and Bunny de la Cruz, will head to the party capital of the USA, Las Vegas, for a three day celebration of all things erotically oversized. There’s plenty of fun stuff planned for the event, too, including a trade show (complete with a BDSM dungeon), seminars, dance parties, a strip poker tournament featuring BBW models, “exhibitionism for the shy”, and workshops on Facesitting and Chest Sitting, Photographing the Big Beautiful Body, Positioning Your Big Girl, as well as multiple model Q&A sessions and general sexually-charged frivolity.

If you’re a BBW admirer who really wants to indulge in a little or a lot of half-drunken carousing across the floors of the Tuscany Suites and Hotel, who’s aching to have Kelly Shibari, Desiree Devine, or Sydney Screams’ kiss your cheek and sign a photo for you, this is a chance unlike any other to fulfill your largest, weightiest fantasies.

More information on BBW FanFest 2012, which runs July 13th to 15th, can be found at the events official website. You’ll find a full roster of appearing models, scheduled events, ticketing details (including some delectable premium packages), and everything else you might need to know before the big day arrives. (Well, everything except what delicious treats to bring your favorite hot ‘n’ hefty pornstar, that is.)

Chicks on Chicks with Dicks

Ava DevineRiding a shemale’s dick before a HD video camera adds a whole other dimension to the career and professional persona of a porn starlet and not always in such a positive way – see the barrage of complaints whenever Ava Devine appears in a Naughty America update. Ava, though, is a perfect example of an adult performer unafraid to try new things, expand her professional repertoire, and fuck people in ways most pornstars simply wouldn’t. A number of times and for a number of websites, including her own official site, Ava  has gone above and beyond what most female pornstars would identify as “the call of duty” to bring her fans something truly exceptional and potentially mind-blowing (not to mention team-changing): sex with transsexuals. Grabbing one of her favorite trans-performers – Vaniity is a frequent partner, as is Morgan Bailey – Ava is inclined to fuck their ladyboy asses with a strap-on, let them fuck her mouth, pussy, or ass, and will even get on all fours for a facial pasting containing millions of microscopic shemale sperm. Hell, she’s even down for some four-way tranny bukkake if the mood strikes, but do you think that gets her a place in the mainstream porn lover’s heart? Hell no, they’re too busy ogling Lexi Belle, Jessie Rogers, and every other blonde cutie-pie with a slim ‘n’ sexy figure who’ll snorkel for clams and smoke some pole and even strap a fake one on, but won’t go near an actual dick-equipped-chick with a 13″ Lex Steele Dong.

It’s great to see a performer of Ava Devine’s calibre and experience giver her tranny sisters a spot in a porn flick many folks otherwise would never find, let alone watch, but isn’t it time a few other notable women of the adult world opened themselves up to a little trans-banging once in a while? Imagine hot new (and very adventurous) starlets Holly Michaels and Skin Diamond teaming up to strap-on-fuck Morgan Bailey’s mouth and ass while she beats her own lil’ meatstick. Look, it’s not exactly my preferred style of smut, but it sure as hell is more original than another softly lit blowjob scene in which everyone plays their prescribed gender role perfectly, never crossing any boundaries, pushing any envelopes, or guzzling a shemale’s oral cum tsunami, wouldn’t you agree?

Webcam Love Pt. 3

As my work reviewing Private Feeds began to wind down and I was running out of polite but firm ways of criticizing various elements of the site’s operation, it came time to say goodbye to HoneyBunny. She looked disappointed that we had never managed to cybernetically consummate our online relationship and told me as much. I admitted the same. Just before I finally left her room and the site for the night, she did me a wonderfully erotic favor by stepping back from the camera and turning to the side, showing me her delightfully curvy body in all its glory. A truly generous and courteous woman! I tipped her one last time. She blew me half-a-dozen kisses, ignoring the other two guys in the room until they shut up and acknowledged our blossoming romance. And then it was all over… or so it seemed.

Before heading off to bed – it was now nearing daybreak; I’m a night owl but this was a bit too late even for me – I sent HoneyBunny a direct message through Private Feeds’ messaging system. I was half expecting to receive no reply, assuming she’d be too busy coaxing tokens out of other horny fellas. What had I been thinking, spending all my alloted review funds on one girl whom I’d be unable to take into a private session? Boy, what a sucker! Anyway, I thanked her for the pleasant conversation and promised to return and make another attempt at giving us some privacy, logged off, and soon fell asleep.

A day went by with no word. Then, just as I was settled into my usual state of self-doubt and mild depression, I received the following message…

Honey Bunny at Private Feeds

Oh, HoneyBunny, you really are one hell of a gal!

Webcam Love Pt. 2

Honey Bunny at Private FeedsAs you’ll recall from the last installment of Webcam Love, your humble narrator recently came upon a webcam performer unlike any other I had “met” – her name was HoneyBunny and I found her on Private Feeds, a fairly unimpressive review subject that suddenly upon meeting her proved itself worthwhile.

Upon clicking the “Enter Group Chat” button on HoneyBunny’s page, I received an error. Clicking it again, I got the same vague and unhelpful notice once more. Click, click, click. Error, error, error. I informed my new acquaintance of my troubles and headed off in search of a solution. The thought of her having to entertain the “puss” obsessed creep while I was left helpless, unable to rescue my fair maiden, filled me with despair. That despair soon turned to rage when I found the allegedly 24/7 live support system of Private Feeds was unavailable. Typical.

I hunted around for a solution to my troubles and found nothing. The site allegedly supported Mac OS X, so the fact that I was using a Macbook shouldn’t be the source of my frustrations, and there were no other hints pointing towards an immediate resolution. I restarted my browser – no luck. I restarted my computer – no luck. I changed my nickname from “MrPink” to “misterpink”  – no luck. Each time I entered HoneyBunny’s room, where she was once again public, her most recent patron quite obviously a one-minute-man, her face seemed to light up as she asked if I had overcome my technological setback. And, I’m sorry to say, each time I had to tell her “no.”

I continued chatting with her while heading offsite in my never-ending search for any possible solution, and I continued to tip her for her patience, for her good humor, and for not being like so many other camgirls I’ve come across in my many online adventures. She received each tip with a smile and blew me kisses and flashed me as a sign of her appreciation like the sweetheart she certainly seemed to be.

But was that really the case? Could some randomly found redheaded, curvaceous Colombian woman really be the first webcam performer this seasoned veteran of online adult entertainment (in all its various forms and fashions) has ever found himself even remotely besotted with truly be such a sweet and genuine friendly, not to mention gorgeous, woman?

The answer lies in the thrilling conclusion to (pause for dramatic effect) Webcam Love.

Stay tuned, sports fans!