Brazzers Buys Madison Ivy

Madison IvyBrazzers’ focus on intense anal scenes, poundings of a blazing speed, and lube-heavy explorations of every female orifice that can conceivably (if not realistically or naturally) fit a penis, tongue, finger, toe, or tool could be the reason only men have been signed to exclusive performance contracts by the ZZ offices (Keiran Lee, for example). Perhaps women were too easily scared off by Brazzers’ reputation for physically demanding scenes and performances. But then, Madison Ivy is no ordinary woman.

Starting her adult career in 2007 at age 18, German-born, Texas-raised Madison Ivy won instant attention for her blonde hair, piercing blue eyes and a slim athletic figure that saw her somewhat typecast as a pigtailed “teen”. After a solid five years in front of the camera, though, the Madison Ivy of today bears little resemblance to the fresh-faced greenhorn of 2007. More tanned than a Jersey Shore cast member, with more obviously supplemented breasts than Pam Anderson, and as fierce a devotee to the benefits of marijuana use as Tommy Chong, 2013’s Madison Ivy is an all-sucking, all-fucking whoring machine. And she’s also the very first woman to sign an exclusive contract with Brazzers, where it is presumed she’ll be giving her fans and Brazzers members a gift many have been hoping for: her very first anal scene.

Congratulations go out to Madison Ivy and to Brazzers, but especially to the members and fans who’ll be witnessing this spectacular performer’s growth in what will undoubtedly be a highly visceral and thrilling fashion.

Being Ambitious (Within Reason) in KPOP

Dal ShabetFan reactions were dismissive when CBS issued a memorandum requesting “buttocks and female breasts [be] adequately covered” for its broadcast of the 2013 Grammy Awards in February, essentially amounting to “If Rhianna wants to show her underboob, we wanna see it!” And, true to expectations, there was plenty of cleavage, thigh, and lower-back on display throughout the ceremony. In South Korea’s thriving pop music industry, however, even second-tier artists find themselves subject to sexual censorship.

Dal Shabet (meaning “Moon Sherbet”) is a six-member girl group signed to Happy Face Entertainment, the company founded by producing duo E-Tribe, the pair responsible for Girls’ Generation’s super-massive-hit ‘Gee’, arguably the song that pushed KPop into the global consciousness, have been the subject of censorship demands from TV station SBS, who objected to the allegedly provocative lyrics of the group’s latest single, ‘Be Ambitious’. The objectionable lines – “When is [our relationship] progressing to the next level / Going home even when drunk / Are you really a man? / Are you being shy?” – were accepted by the MBC and KBS, the two other major TV stations on which Dal Shabet were booked for promotional performances, but SBS insisted and eventually got the changes they requested. The new lyrics – “Do you even find my aegyo (cutsey behavior) cute? / Why do you keep looking at the clock? / Look at me / Do you really like me?” – are definitely not as provocative as those deemed questionable, but apparently that wasn’t enough for some of those rejected the message of ‘Be Ambitious’, one of women demanding the attention and affection they crave instead of being taken for granted or ignored entirely.

The Korean title of ‘Be Ambitious’, ‘?? ?????? ??‘ translates to ‘Look at My Legs’ and it’s clear from the amount of lower limb skin shown in the group’s concept images and music video that Serri, Jiyul, Ah Young, GaEun, Woohee, and Subin were going to attract ample attention from fans and detractors both for their flashy new image. (Dal Shabet have historically been something of a whipping boy for netizens’ frustration and bile, unfairly so.) Somewhat surprisingly, though, the second prominent demand for censorship came not from the entertainment industry, but from a male rights group called Man of Korea (MOK). Claiming “the lyrics and music video of ‘Be Ambitious’ depreciate both women and men, and it’s harmful to the youth,’ MOK has requested the song be banned from further distribution, also claiming the song will induce “sexual assault from the youth by planting the wrong influence about women and sex” and citing scenes in the music video allegedly “depreciating the 60,000 soldiers” currently serving South Korea as similarly deplorable.

Gee, you’d think a national pop industry known for celebrating the ridiculous and outlandish (and the female leg) would recognize a work of satirical pop greatness when it roars onto the Gaon charts!

Nervous Husband – Missy Pink’s Sex Advice

Missy Pinks at MrPinks.comMissy Pink,

I’m married to a wonderful stay at home Mom. My wife and I are the same age, 33, and things have always seemed to work out perfectly within our marriage. A few months ago she met a stay at home Dad, through a mutual play date, and they’ve developed a very strong friendship, even calling and texting during the evening hours. She doesn’t hide anything, but, she talks about him all the time and I found myself feeling nervous about their relationship, so, I told her my feelings. We talked calmly and she eased my ill feelings, but within days I was more upset than before and we both said hurtful things to one another. There’s been a damage done that I’m not sure can be reversed.

Nervous Husband

Dear Nervous;

You use words such as, “nervous and ill feelings,” when describing how the friendship your wife has with another man, but let’s be honest here, you’re jealous.  I found myself wanting to say, if you’re feeling insecure about this friendship, that tells me you know there are areas that have caused voids for her and maybe she’s found someone else to fill them. To look at this logically, they have much in common, both being stay at home parents, they can compare notes, complain, boast, brag, and literally go crazy over the hectic side of their days, and they know it’s completely understood. While you’re out in the work force, talking to adults and having a change of scenery, she’s been at home watching Sesame Street and carrying on conversations about how potty training works…now she has adult attention.

You didn’t mention if anything was failing in the bedroom part of your marriage, which leads me to believe you feel the connection is more of an emotional one, and if that’s the case, it could get tricky. She’s felt on her own in many ways I’m sure for quite some time, and now there’s finally a sympathetic ear and a non judgmental sounding board that has become her salvation. In some ways, that’s more satisfying than a sexual orgasm.

Since you stepped outside of the comfort zone and hurtful words were spoken, it’s going to take some time on your end to make amends, if that’s the route you’re wanting to go. It will be hard however to do your best to smooth things over if you still have that gnawing feeling in the pit of your stomach, and, if she refuses to end the friendship, one marital blow up is going to lead to another.

My recommendation would be….be honest. Sit her down, explain that you’re sorry for what you said, and even though you both were hurt, you want to discuss things as adults and at least get to a place where you don’t feel the constant flow of anger between you, and then, seek the assistance of a professional. Yes, couple’s counseling sounds like it may be called for. If you love her as I believe you do, but you feel this threatened over her closeness to another male, then you need a mediator to oversee your healing. Also, there could be the possibility that she has emotional feelings for this male friend and she doesn’t know how to deal with them, maybe that’s the cause for her to become defensive, there are many ways things could go, so, being constructive is the best route to take.

Don’t just toss away the idea of counseling, you may need to be on a therapist’s couch before you get back into the marital bed.