Appealing though they may be upon first impressions, some porn studios are less devoted sweethearts and more like psychotic ex-girlfriends, out to harass you at every turn until you relent and once again throw your life away to devote every waking second to worshipping her every atom. Some guys simply spy their ideal woman and pursue her relentlessly while others let her make the first, second, third moves. In this analogy, dear reader, you are the hapless fella on the receiving end of an obsessive pursuit from Brazzers, your stand-in lover and one of the web’s most popular adult entertainment venues. The legendary ZZ was already trying to lure you in for a membership to its large and HD-loaded network, but now, like the stereotypical shopper going bananas over department store discounts, Brazzers celebrates Black Friday by offering an unbeatable deal any ZZ-admirer will struggle to resist.
I know, I know. Black Friday was last week and this week, if it gets identified as retail sale-related, is Cyber Week, but nobody told Brazzers, who are still promoting an extended Black Friday deal that gets you one full year inside the amazing Brazzers carnival at the super-heavily discounted rate of just $7.50-a-month, payable in one $89.99 installment. For more specific details on what Brazzers delivers to those who purchase a yearly pass, check out Mr. Pink’s full review of the Brazzers network and our Beating on a Budget blog post that details just how good Brazzers discount deals usually are. Normally set well over one hundred dollars, this annual pass to the infamous Brazzers empire seems the most sensible and financially responsible Black Friday porno bargain still (somehow, still) going.
With the holiday season now well and truly kicked into gear, it’s time for all of us at Mr. Pink’s to reflect on those things that bring us joy, happiness, and roaring hard-ons. This week I took the opportunity to check in with some old favorites and see how they’re faring of late. Shiofuky’s gushing Japanese marvels and the extended all-Asian network JAV HD is a great reminder of just how weird and wild porno can be, all the while starring some of the damn cutest women even fucked on film. Wicked Pictures, known for its narrative tales and educational DVDs, continues to deliver pornographic excellence across a wide range of styles and situations while a chief competitor, Digital Playground, makes a beeline for your fantasy gland, tickles it tenderly then leaves you to enjoy the post-orgasmic glow it leaves you with. Ah, porno, where would we be without you?
Every holiday that rolls through a given year brings with it a few key emotions. Anticipating a day off work can lead to a false sense of relaxation and security. Anxiety over December’s gift-buying sprees can leave you listless. And, perhaps most dangerously of all, Thanksgiving can thrust you into one of two camps: the defensive traditionalist or the critical idealist. Whether you view the holiday as a beloved American tradition or evidence of the shameful parts of our nation’s history, Thanksgiving brings you closer not just to your family, but to holiday-themed smut that can really help bring some brightness (and a boner) into your post-turkey nap time. Each year, we at Mr. Pink’s scour the pornosphere and showcase some Thanksgiving-themed scenes put out by porn’s most creative producers and studios. This year we have Naughty America, Brazzers, and Passion HD, three stalwarts of porno excellence that never miss an opportunity to branch out.
First to hit the WiFi-waves and drape the first major notch in the holiday seasons belt was Passion HD’s Taboo Thanksgiving which landed early Wednesday morning. Sexy newbie Carolina Sweets tells her step-dad Johnny Castle how pleased she is to be sharing Thanksgiving with him, but honestly, going by the look on his face as she pushes her barely-covered orange-dressed body against his, he’s clearly already very appreciative.
Brazzers isn’t the kind of studio to let a holiday slip by unpornified and this year sees Kendra’s Thanksgiving Stuffing deliver plenty of sauciness as the indomitable Ms. Lust pounces on her daughter’s new boyfriend, Jordi El Niño Polla, the first chance she gets, her dullard husband be damned! The hung young Latin lover jumps at the chance to snag an older woman, especially one as vivacious as Kendra Lust, ignoring his girlfriend and her father as they beg the horny pair to stop.
Naughty America rarely lets its horny holiday-porn seekers down and this year 2 Chicks Same Time brings you a loving couple, Phoenix Marie and Charles Dera, who invite another couple over for Thanksgiving dinner only to end up ditching the dude and whisking his girlfriend into the other room for a seriously taboo three-way tryst. Ms. Marie once again proves herself an excellent dome, taking charge of busty blonde Kayla Kayden and putting her to work pleasuring Marie’s own husband. All the while, Kayla’s clueless husband sits at the dinner table watching the turkey and stuffing get cold.
Whether you’re timing to fill your belly with nature’s bounty or fill a certain someone with your own Thanksgiving offering – or spend a little alone time with the noted nut-busters outlined above – Mr. Pink’s wishes you a very happy holiday season kick-off!