Discount Porn | Mr. Pink's Blog - Part 9

Beatin’ on a Budget! with WTF Pass

European hardcore networks litter the Internet like drive-through photomats once littered the parking lots of North American strip malls, but how do you discern the worth of one from the other? How do you filter out the untranslated, unintelligible drivel pouring out of many Eastern European states to leave only the highest quality Euro-smut? Why, by heeding the advice of your go-to porn advisor, Mr. Pink, of course! And there’s one particular Euro-hardcore network that’s proven quite popular around the office, a network with some peculiar sexual habits and a giant-cocked Panda: WTF Pass.

Home to eleven sites – College Fuck Parties, Pickup Fuck, Hard Fuck Girls, Porn Weekends, Dolls Porn, Public Sex Adventures, HD Massage Porn, Panda Fuck, The Art Porn, and Meet, Suck & Fuck – WTF Pass may indeed leave the average porn viewer muttering “What the fuuuuck?”, erection-in-hand as they stare at a twelve-person orgy in the middle of a forest, extreme double-penetrations, on-bus blowjobs, and, yes, even sex with a guy in a strap-on-equipped Panda costume. There’s no doubt WTF Pass presents a wide and quite weird variety of hardcore thrills, but is it plentiful enough to warrant your patronage? With close to 2000 scenes online, I dare say it is, but let’s find out for sure.

THE MATH:
WTF Pass usually charges its members $34.95-a-month for access privileges, but with Mr. Pink on the case, and a discount on the cards for readers, this adventurous Europorn network is now more affordable than ever: only $19.95-a-month! Just how does that work out on a scene-by-scene basis? Let’s the the calculator and muster up some numbers! WTF Pass’s eleven networked websites each come out to a cost of just $1.80-a-month each, a bargain by anyone’s standards. The 1865 scenes currently on offer (including both video and photo content) each come to barely more than one cent each, 1.07¢ to be exact. One cent for a 50-minute outdoor six-girl, four-guy orgy, a Panda-blowing teen slut, or tender and romantic ass-fucking on a four-poster bed.

It’s rare to find such a boldly debaucherous Euro network offering such affordable memberships, so be sure to give WTF Pass some serious consideration while the bargain-priced membership is still available. (But be sure to check out our fully detailed WTF Pass website reviews right here at Mr. Pink’s before you do!)

Re-Gifting for Porn’s Sake

The holiday season traditionally sees an exchange of gifts between friends and family members, tokens of appreciation for putting up with each others’ idiosyncrasies and issues for another year. Unfortunately, the desire to give the perfect (or at least perfectly usable) gift often outweighs the personal element. Case in point: the gift card.

Handed out en masse every holiday season and easily purchased from supermarkets, gas stations, corner stores, 7-Elevens, and many other vendors, a gift card entitles the bearer to spend a predetermined, stated amount at a corresponding store. But what if you loathe L.L.Bean’s collegiate winter wear, object to Wal-Mart’s dominance of national and now international retail, or simply won’t set foot in a DSW for fear of contaminating your feet with the stench of others’? What do you do with your apparently useless gift cards then? Why, purchase some porn, of course!

With a number of adult sites and networks now accepting payment via store-affiliated gift card, I thought a rundown of such smut vendors would serve to enlighten you, dear readers, as to your spending options. And, hey, think of this way: when your father-in-law asks what you ended up buying from Home Depot, you can let him know that whacking it to Jayden Jaymes’s marvelous heaving breasts was more important than a new ball-peen hammer. Maybe.

Spend your unwanted gift cards at the following adult emporiums and ensure no gift card goes to waste. The gift card in my wallet, a $15 Starbucks card, could buy you the following membership stints at the following sites (with duration and price changing per gift card brand and value):

– 16 days with the amply-titted anal-loving fuck-freaks of Brazzers.
– 26 days with Naughty America’s MILFs and housewives and step-sisters.
– 9 days of ogling DDF Network’s European goddesses, foot fetishists, teen lesbians, and busty beauties.
– 30 days marveling at Videobox’s impossibly wide range of on-demand smut.
– 14 days, a solid fortnight, checking out the legendary Hustler archives.
– 14 days with Spizoo, the 13-site globe-trotting pornstar-fucking extravaganza.

Conditions apply, of course (minimum $10 balance, certain card brands only) but at least there’s finally a way to rid yourself of hard plastic currency usable only at unsexy stores that most certainly don’t stock Interracial Booty Intruders, Mommy Needs Money #2, or an HD version of Pirates 2: Stagnetti’s Revenge.

Beatin’ on a Budget! with Twistys

Home to thousands of porn’s most glamorous and gorgeous women, including the famous Treats of the Month and Year, Twistys has been dazzling fans of both softcore and hardcore porn for over 12 years and is now more affordable than ever before.

Twistys started out in the early 2000’s as a polished softcore glamour site producing pictorials and later videos showing off the marvelous physiques and sizzling sensuality of models like Bree Olson, Heather Vandeven, Emily Addison, and Elle Alexandra. From redheads to brunettes, Cali Girls to New Yorkers to European beauties, and from basic stripteases to the combined softcore and hardcore treats of today, Twistys has gone from strength to strength and is now poised to attract a new fanbase thanks to an impressive (and irresistible) deal. Thanks to Mr. Pink’s and the folks at Twistys HQ, membership can now be had for the meager monthly price of $14.95 – no, not just for your first month; yes, that does includes rebills! Including access to the entire back catalog of daily Twistys updates, every monthly and yearly-crowned Treat, and whatever you find elsewhere on the Twistys Network, whether something from Twistys Teasers, lesbian sex site When Girls Play, the very explicit Twistys Hard, Blue Fantasies, Euro Foxes, Busty Ones, and the sites of models Nicole Graves and Anette Dawn, a Twistys membership certainly isn’t something to sneeze at.

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THE MATH:
With an expanded network archive containing 12,823 videos and 31,581 photo galleries, the Twistys empire has near-endless smut to deliver and now that membership is cheaper than ever, said content offers even more value! The cost of individual videos boils down to an absolute pittance, only .001¢, while photo galleries are even better value (assuming you’re a stills, not motion man) at .0005¢ a pop! If it’s the bonus sites you’re most interested in, good news: each of the nine sites operating under the Twistys marquee are each priced at $1.66-per-month if you take advantage of this killer deal.

Ok, so you’re still here, having failed to rush on over to Twistys and land yourself the most gob-smackingly grab-worthy porn deal in months and the only reason I can think of is that you and Twistys haven’t really been properly introduced. Well, allow me to rectify that right now. Readers, meet your exotic sexual playground. Twistys, meet my readers – now blow their damn socks off!

Mr. Pink’s Twistys review

Beatin’ on a Budget! with Team Skeet

In the days leading up to the Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanzaa season, saving money is on everyone’s mind. Whether lining up for early morning Black Friday retail chaos or scouring the Internet for the best online bargains, there’s many, many ways to shop well and save a decent chunk of change, perhaps to spend on yourself. So, what Christmas present will you be buying yourself this year? One filled with nubile sluts, drooling deep-throaters, exotic black and Latina babes, and the newest inductees into porn’s ranks of 2014 rookies? Oh good, I see you’re familiar with Team Skeet then!

Skeeters (as I like to call ’em) are folks devoted to 19-site porn network Team Skeet, folks who usually pay $28.97-a-month for access to this teen-heavy sexual playground. And now, just in time for the holidays (when you’ll no doubt jump ship from family room to den/garage/car for a little sanity), Team Skeet is inviting anyone who’s never indulged to do so for a pretty paltry price: $9.87-a-month!

“Hey, Pink? What would I get get if I was one of these ‘Skeeters’ you speak of?” Well, buddy, Team Skeet is home to 19 websites – Exxxtra Small, Innocent High, Teen Pies, Teen Curves, She’s New, Teens Do Porn, Lust HD, Step Siblings, POV Life, Rub-a-Teen, The Real Workout, This Girl Sucks, Teens Love Money, Oye Loca, Teeny Black, Titty Attack, Her Freshman Year, Self Desire, and Solo Interviews – and they serve up all kinds of powerfully explicit sex acts in dazzling High Definition videos, many updating weekly. Sure, some of the sites are no longer updating at all, but this is network porn we’re talking about – that’s always the case! The Team Skeet model roster is as impressive as the network is large – 1,765 scenes at writing and five-to-seven new ones arriving weekly – and features such dazzling dick-wranglers as American cuties Riley Reid and Ali Rae, Chinese Alina Li, African-American babes Ashton Devine and Chanel Heart, and promising newcomers Ava Taylor, Halle Von, and Dakota James. With ladies like these working their magic on the Team Skeet small screen, the origins of this network’s name are no mystery, that’s for sure.

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The Math:
At the introductory price of only $9.87-a-month, Team Skeet has never been more affordable or irresistible. The 19 Team Skeet sites work out to individually cost less than 52¢, an amazing price even for the oddly included European sites Lust HD and Rub-a-Teen. With 1,765 scenes online, it’s clear Skeeters have plenty to ogle, admire, and enjoy here and at a great price, too: individual scenes cost an astonishing .005¢ each! Truly Team Skeet has gone bonkers for bargains this holiday period, either that or they’re all skeeted out and simply acting irrationally. Hey, all the better for us, right?

One tip before you rush off and get yourself into some skeetastic trouble, though: under this promotion Team Skeet memberships automatically rebills at close to full price ($24.87). You’re getting one month of Team Skeet’s treasures for less than ten bucks, but keep an eye on your end-date if you don’t wanna get hit with a twenty-five-dollar charge… although, even at that price, Team Skeet’s well worth it.

Mr. Pink’s Team skeet review