Cosmo’s Female-Friendly Porn Picks

Once again courting controversy and enraging anti-sex activists across the USA, Cosmopolitan, the women’s magazine with distribution in 110 countries around the world, decided “Have Hotter Sex This Summer” and “4 Scary Things Gynos Tell You and Why You Shouldn’t Wig Out” weren’t exciting enough stories and opted to recommend some porn to their overwhelmingly female readership, porn Cosmo felt would be a good fit for female viewers. Of course, reactionary anti-sex groups immediately called the publication itself an item of pornography and demanded it be removed from super market shelves or wrapped in a black mylar sleeve so as not to infect the eyes and minds of tots as their parents unload two cartfuls of carcinogenic soda-pop onto the checkout belt. In solidarity with the oppressed Cosmo staff and readership, Mr. Pink’s is staging this silent – as in written, not spoken – protest. (And also, you know, checking out Cosmo’s recs and seeing how they fare on the ol’ Pink-O-Meter).

cosmo porn for women

Cosmo writer Jill Hamilton and graphic artist Lauren Ahn concocted their guide to female-friendly porn is the hopes of (according to Ahn’s rating meter graphic) turning women away from Ron Jeremy and his ilk and towards James Deen and the new generation of adventurous pornographers. After proffering free sites (and irresponsibly sidestepping the wealth of piracy and copyright problems plaguing the industry) and Tumblr feeds (erotic literature, female orgasm guides) of little use to anyone keen to avoid unbearably pretentious “literotica”, Hamilton brought us to sites more commonly identified as commercial pornography that she felt a good fit for Cosmo’s readers. The list, while not exactly throwing out a bevy of surprises, features some stellar adult sites that also come with Mr. Pink’s glowing recommendation.

Masturbation sites I Feel Myself and Beautiful Agony, both by Feck of The Netherlands, garnered raves for their incredible intimacy and drastically different approach to visual arousal, earning 4-out-of-5 each on the Jeremy-to-James hotness scale. Erika Lust of Lust Cinema’s viewer-submitted fantasy site, X-Confessions also caught the attention of Hamilton for its short films conceived by women. Beautiful cinematography an performers give a classy feel to X-Confessions, which also earns a 4 from Cosmo. Curiously, Kink is also noted as a must-see but given a non-rating of 1-5; “They’ll probably have what you want and other things you didn’t know you wanted may end up in your cart as well,” Hamilton writes. The clear winner, though – and this will hardly surprise anyone who’s discussed porn with a woman under 60 in the past five years – is Mr. Deen himself, his official site scoring a perfect 5 for giving this particular journalist the feeling of being “vicariously well-fucked,” and left with “a mysterious glow the rest of the day.”

James Deen, Cosmo’s cure for the sexually frustrated woman in your life… whether you like it or not.

James Deen review

Big Winners, Big Women

biggie

The Biggie Awards, adult entertainment’s annual celebration of all things BBW (the women, the movies, the directors, the waistlines) went off without a hitch in Las Vegas this weekend past and, as expected, a new lineup of remarkable talents were decreed the best in the biz by their peers and fans. Before we run through some of those taking home Biggies this year, though, be sure to jump back a few weeks and read Mr. Pink’s preview of the event.

April Flores and Brianna Rose in Marshmallow Girls 2, 2015, Evil Angel
[April Flores and Brianna Rose in Marshmallow Girls 2, 2015, Evil Angel]

(Now, I really must make a minor complaint at this point: it appears BBWCon and the Biggie Awards crews are recovering from their events, as suggested by their lifeless social media profiles, the absence of convention floor footage on YouTube, and the minimal coverage given to the toast of the performing BBW community. Want greater recognition? Insist upon it!)

As reported by AVN, Odette Delacroix, this year’s winner of Best Fetish/Speciality site for PetiteVsPlump.com and, strangely enough, quite a thin woman. Thanking the BBW community for opening their arms to a woman whose body type would normally exclude her from such an organization, Delacroix encapsulated what makes the BBW side of the adult industry so damn worth supporting: open-mindedness and community.

Now, onto some winners…

BBWcon Hall of Fame: Sapphire
BBW Media Outlet of the Year: Phat-Mag.com
Director of the Year: Josh Stone
Studio of the Year: Sensational Video
Fan Favorite: Mandy Majestic
Newcomer of the Year: Kimmie KaBoom
XXX Performer of the Year: Eliza Allure
BBW of the Year: Vylette Vonne
Best Belly of the Year: Alexxxis Allure
Best Boobs of the Year: Kimmie Kaboom
Best Butt of the Year: Victoria Secret
Best BBW DVD Series of the Year: Scale Bustin’ Babes
Best Lesbian Scene of the Year: April Flores & Brianna Rose in Marshmallow Girls 2 (Evil Angel)

April Flores @ Evil Angel

Beating on a Budget! with Fetish Network

fetish network

The high cost of producing hardcore fetish porn usually means that those producers must then charge viewers a little bit more to ensure they can stay in production. Whips, chains, leather clothing, rented dungeons, fluid shields for the camera, trauma counseling for the less experienced performers, and, of course, the hiring of talent brave and bold enough to be dropped naked into a dunk tank or strapped to a hobby horse and relentlessly pounded until there’s nothing left but a whimpering, drooling tangle of limbs and hair, these are all major expenses that most porn productions never encounter. Thankfully, there’s a hardcore fetish network that has decided enough is enough, high prices don’t get people into paying for porn, discounts do! Fetish Network, home to 44 exclusive websites dealing in various hardcore sexual antics, has slashed its entry fee from almost forty bucks and now asks you to pay just $19.95 for a month-long membership.

Fetish Network’s websites – Brutal Castings, Sexual Disgrace, My Kinky Diary, Strap-On Squad, Helpless Teens, Pain Freaks, Tokyo Slaves, Brainwashed Teens, Amateur Trampling, Glam Bitches, and Brutal Ball Busting among them – cover every conceivable BDSM sub-genre from abusive insult-laden handjobs to foot-focused female domination, from smoking fetishization to jerk-off instruction, and then some. (Teenage hitchhiker porn, anyone?) And, to top it all of, Fetish Network is free to browse. You won’t be able to view full videos or galleries, but you’ll sure as shit know whether or not this is a network for you before plonking down $19.95 and entertaining your most sordid fantasies.

THE MATH:
With the current $19.95-discount in place, Fetish Network, currently home to 44 exclusive websites, could be seen as charging just 45¢ for access to each of its sites. And, with 3,766 scenes filling the immense network archives (again, completely exclusive), your membership purchase boils down to just .5¢ (point-five-of-one-cent) per scene, a truly staggering rate if ever we’ve featured one. Obviously there’ll be plenty of readers not at all interested in watching Marsha May hypnotized into sucking dick, nor Montana Sky rope-tied and fucked senseless, but those with a penchant for pain or a boner of bondage will most certainly be very pleased this Fetish Network deal has come along.