Pornington Post’s Bipartisan Porn Parodies

Pornington Post

Appearing out of nowhere earlier today in the form of an AVN press release and the occupation of url, a brand new parody and satire site entered the adult fray, bringing to a fucking head the frustrations of many Americans welling up over this utterly insane election season. Whether you’re committed to one candidate or the other, or consider them both woefully unfit for office, you must’ve noticed the lack of biting porn satires of Hillary Clinton’s and Donald Trump’s respective careers, campaigns, and personal failings. Now that Trump brought pussy into the conversation, Pornington Post aims to ensure nobody involved in this year’s Presidential race leaves unstained by the mighty comedic jism of the porn parody.

Hosting only three original scenes at present (and filling the dead space with barely-related celebrity culture spoofs), Pornington Post’s intentions are unclear. There’s no sign-up page to part you with your money yet there’s Nina Hartley as Hillary, and there’s Evan Stone wearing a Make America Great Again cap standing next to his “daughter” Ivanka, played by sly-eyed blonde Blair Williams. Ivanka doesn’t waste any alone time, masturbating with a bobble head avatar of dear old dad as she listens to his stump speech rhetoric. Viewers can easily expect the third debate to be the focus of another scene or two, one including seeing former VP nominee Sarah Palin once again pornified in what’s being touted as a “squirt board” scene co-starring Kim Jong Un.

When Pornington Post claims to guarantee “controversial, politically incorrect and outrageously provocative” porn, it really isn’t kidding. And still, unlike our two Presidential candidates, I can’t find an obvious price tag anywhere…

Pokémon Porn Persists

Pornstar Go: a XXX Parody

Since its July 6 release, augmented reality game Pokémon Go has captured the imaginations (and free time) of millions of players worldwide. As Mr. Pink’s reported to you last week, the game has also captured the imagination of pornographers both amateur and pro. After we previously noted Pokémon-themed porn efforts from Team Skeet’s Exxxtra Small and Teen Pies, RK (Reality Kings) Prime, and Cosplay Babes, another wave of Poké-porn arrived to further milk the world’s reigning gaming trend.

Arguably the king of porn parody mountain, Brazzers didn’t spare any costuming expenses for its Pornstar Go: a XXX Parody production, the results of which went live on Monday. Replacing the super powered pocket monsters with magical pornstars who vanish from porn sets across the valley, Brazzers has Spanish newcomer Jordi El Niño Polla hunting for Ella Hughes, Patty Michova, and Alexa Tomas in an effort to return them to their rightful homes at Brazzers HQ. A trio of women this irresistible shouldn’t need any extra incentive to pursue, but once captured, they reveal their true animalistic intentions.

Taking a less fantastic angle on Poké-porn, Bryan Gozzling’s Hookup Hotshot site brought to our attention a skinny raven-haired Ivy Aura. Keeping with Gozzling’s social media focus, Ivy is recruited to accompany our host on some Pokémon Go hunts only to find he’s far more interested in fingering her asshole, urinating in her mouth, and unloading his seed onto her expectant face – and they don’t even get around to catching any Pokémon!

While it’s unlikely this is the last of the Pokémon parody porn coming your way in this time of near-global Poké-fever, it’s clearer than ever that a pop-culture phenomenon doesn’t require any greater inclusion in porn than a brief reference made by jaw-dropping new starlet. (But hey, check out Ella Hughes in costume – that sure doesn’t hurt!)

Brazzers review

Poké-men dig Strokémon


Quit Pokémon Go for just a second and check this shit out! Not only has the latest iteration of the pocket monster phenomenon led to a larger game playing audience than any earlier Pokémon release, it has sparked a worldwide obsession that has Wall Street bankers and McDonald’s workers on the picket line both using their smart phones to ensnare the little digital critters. Even adult webcam performers leapt onto the Pokémon Go bandwagon, using cosplay and screen-sharing to enjoy the game with their fans. Now, naturally, it’s the mainstream porn world’s turn.

RK Prime, a newish Reality Kings site with no clear premise, unleashed its Pokémon parody on July 30th, an outdoor scene that saw Xander Corvus on a hunt for “Pikapuss” (Annika Eve in her second scene) and, upon finding her, fills her mouth beneath a tree then pulls her inside to slide into her yellow-outfitted snatch as she cries “Pika! Pika!” in pleasure.

Team Skeet also joined in the fun with a pair of Poké-focused scenes for Exxxtra Small and Teen Pies and starring Freya Von Doom and Cece Capella respectively. Freya arrived first, landing July 28th in her bright yellow “Pikahoe” outfit, ducking and dodging an eager trainer before respawning in his living room and exposing her very much pink and human orifices. For a change of pace, Cece Capella laid around in her Teen Pies scene, staring at a Pikachu plushie and daydreaming about catching one of her own. After dozing off, Cece wakes up to a real, living, already erect (but curiously human male) Pikachu who proceeds to bring her Poké-fucking fantasies to life.

You would think that with Pokémon Go roaring up the app charts and distracting every second pedestrian under the age of 55, this would be the prime Poké-parody era but, really, all three of the above listed scenes were outdone months and months ago by two distinctly different takes on the gaming phenomenon. Back in January of 2015, Cosplay Babes had busty British wonder Harmony Reigns dress up in her best Ash cap and grab her Pokéballs for an interracial hardcore fuckfest. It’s WoodRocket, the comedy-porn hybrid studio started by Lee Roy Myers, that still rules the porno Pok é-parody roost, though, thanks largely to the studio’s devotion to absurdity. Starring Rizzo Ford as Dikachu, a squirt-shooting female monster whose trainer, Gash (Tyler Nixon) carries quite an impressive package. Badly acted with questionable costuming and even a rather dire script, Strokémon takes the cake because it pushes further than simple cosplay and reimagines the Pokêverse as an utterly perverted playground for all kinds of sexual creatures, human and otherwise, without getting too close to some bizarre fucking fantasies. Dikachu might not look like an electrified rodent exactly, but you wouldn’t confuse her for 100% human either.

There’ll no doubt be more Poké-themed scenes and parodies on the horizon now that Pokémon Sun and Moon has been announced, so keep a beady eye trained at Mr. Pink’s for more info and analysis as they appear.