Boob Aid

So, untold buckets of ice-water have been dumped on the heads of celebrities and nobodies alike but there’s millions of people out there who still don’t know what the fuck an ALS even is! Clearly, that Lou Gehrig guy, sick though he may be, is going about raising awareness the absolute wrong way. Clearly he should be groping Japanese women’s breasts on television.

boob aid

Unofficially dubbed ‘Boob Aid’ by its fans and sticking by its motto “Making a social contribution while enjoying the erotic,” a charity event organized by Stop!AIDS and broadcast on Sky Perfect TV ran for 24 straight hours and featured little more than a dozen Japanese pornstars lining up and inviting fans to grope and fondle their breasts. The only catch, only those donating money to the campaign could cop a feel. Boob Aid aimed to raise funds and awareness for Japan’s AIDS sufferers and to promote safe sex practices aimed at prevention further transmission of the virus, which currently affects approximately 8,100 Japanese.

Adult star Rina Serina spoke to Tokyo Sports newspaper prior to the event, saying “I’m really looking forward to lots of people fondling my boobs. I never thought my boobs could contribute to society.” Iku Sakuragi, another performer baring her breasts for AIDS sufferers, added “It’s for charity. Squeeze them, donate money. Let’s be happy!” Can’t argue with that, can ya? In any case, the 2,000 attendees couldn’t argue with such a worthy cause and novel promotion, flocking to the event and laying their hands on twelve pairs of pornstar breasts.

See footage from last year’s event below and, please, before you try your hand at starting a charity fund-raising event or (God forbid) meme, do try to incorporate nudity to an excessive degree.

Dining with Dicks in Taiwan

Of the many reasons to visit Taiwan – suncake pastries and incredible hot pot; more than 15,000 glorious temples; the incredible Taroko National Park – eating a bowl of rice in the shape of a cock ‘n’ balls probably wasn’t high on your list. Thanks to a recent addition to Taiwan’s theme restaurant industry, though, that’s all about to change.

Funny Sex, located in Lingya District in Taiwan’s second largest city, Khaosiung, caters to a clientele more sexually liberated than your average diner and does so with a touch of the absurd. From the outside, it appears a restaurant like any other, but once you’ve ascended the drab stairway and taken a seat, the erotic elements start to make themselves known. Menus offer informative tidbits about the sex habits and genital measurements of different countries, as well as a plethora of sexually charged dishes. As detailed by Jamie Fullerton of Munchies, the dishes on Funny Sex’s menu aren’t necessarily inspired by sex, but their presentation most certainly is. Take a look at this chocolate pudding:
chocolate pudding penis

And this soup bowl:
tittybowl

At Funny Sex, it seems everything edible is penis shaped or housed in a firm (perhaps too firm) pair of breasts. And if the food doesn’t interest you all that much, there’s giant wooden phalluses to ride, blow-up dolls in bondage restraints, and real dolls that can accompany lone diners. Truly, Taiwan’s Funny Sex restaurant is doing the lord’s satan’s Dionysus’s work.

Family Fit – Missy Pink’s Sex Advice

Missy Pinks at MrPinks.comMissy Pink,

I have what might be a strange problem. My husband’s Dad recently moved in with us. We’re in the process of fixing up the basement into his separate apartment, but, until then, he’s sleeping on the sofa in our family room. The problem is this, he is obsessed with online porn and he uses my laptop to log on and then jack off while watching it. I cannot tell you how many times I’ve tried my best to disinfect the keyboard and casing because there are splatters of his cum all over it. I’m ready to throw him out of the house but my husband thinks it’s funny, saying things such as, “Men will be men!” Either he leaves or I do.

Having a Family Fit

Dear Friend;

I won’t be so callous as to say I know how you feel, because I don’t. Unless you’re an exhibitionist, or a partaker of group fornication, sex is usually a pretty private endeavor, especially when it comes in the form of masturbation, either solo or shared between partners, but, taking the risk of a family member walking in, well, that would be a difficult situation to say the least. Of course, putting a bit of a fetish spin on it means your father in law may feel a bit of heightened excitement by that very fact, the sneaking and possibility of getting caught is always a powerful aphrodisiac.

With that being said, allow me to play the devil’s advocate and voice an opinion from both sides of the situation. For whatever reasons, your husband’s Dad has left the privacy of his own home and is learning to adapt to sharing a dwelling with you and your family. So, out of respect for him, I have to say, I’m sure it’s not been an easy transaction from his point of view either. There’s going to be a learning curve, it just so happens that curve carries the act of masturbation and orgasms that aren’t cleaned up properly. His stress and despair may be lessened by sexual release in the form of jacking off once he thinks the family has turned in for the night, and, unless he takes the laptop to the bathroom, locking the door behind him, there’s probably not going to be 100% privacy.

I can certainly understand your despair over the situation, not to mention frustration with your husband, who has seemingly incorporated the, “That’s my boy!” type of pride in his Dad. For him, that’s an assurance of his own fate in years to come, if his Father still jerks off often, then he assumes his sex drive won’t decrease with age either. Of course that doesn’t alter the fact that he’s not being very understanding to your concern and anger.

Unless your relative is spending too much of his time enjoying self stimulation, to the point where it’s unhealthy, then, I would say approaching the topic with him may cause a family rift, and humiliation that may be irreversible. He may feel such embarrassment over knowing you are aware of his middle of the night cock cravings that sitting down for Thanksgiving dinner will hold a lot of tension in the air. Not to mention, even speaking of it with him could leave you red in the face and stammering. And by all means, don’t lash out when you’re angry, things can be said that won’t have a way to take back.

My honest advice to you would be, put a fire under getting that basement converted. Whoever is doing the construction work, tell them to put things into high gear so he has his privacy, it will be a win/win situation for both sides. Set up his own computer, make sure the wifi has him connected and then close your mind to what goes on downstairs while you’re upstairs. I realize cleaning up spattered sperm of your Father in Law is not something anyone would particularly want to do, so, expedite the living quarters.

Tell your husband if his Dad continues to cum, you’re going to go!