Porn | Mr. Pink's Blog - Part 188

Dave Attell’s Showtime Circle Jerk

Comedian Dave Attell has never tried to hide parts of his personality that some might view as, well, decadent. On his show Insomniac (2001-2004), Attell wandered around various US cities during the moonlit hours, drank booze in bars and clubs, and met fellow nighthawks, most of them the kinds of folks TV execs wouldn’t want anywhere near a prime-time slot. When I was fortunate enough to attend a taping of the resurrected Gong Show in The Entertainment Capital of the World, Hollywood California a few years back, Attell, taking Chuck Barris’s place as the host/ringmaster, would spend shooting breaks standing in the wings chain-smoking and looking less than thrilled with bumbling crew members.

Now, with his second gig hosting the annual Adult Video News (AVN) Awards in Las Vegas coming up in January of next 2012, Attell’s connections to the porn world are only growing stronger. But, hey, the guy’s an old pro when it comes to fuckin’ on film. Just check out his current Showtime jaunt, Dave’s Old Porn. Digging back into the VHS archives from porn’s Golden Age, the 1970s and early ‘80s, Attell and his guests (Whitney Cummings, Adam Carolla, Chelsea Handler and other mildly humorous celebs) give running commentaries while showing some of adult cinemas greatest and crummiest titles, from The Devil in Miss Jones to Ultra Flesh. Porn veterans Nina Hartley and Ron Jeremy, Belladonna drop in to give a professional’s perspective on some of the cheesiest dialog, most bizarre plots, and (presumably) least attractive hairstyles even seen on the small screen.

Fucking Punks!

Earlier this week, Mr. Pink’s took a wander through the Burning Angel network in preparation for a slew of new reviews of Joanna and crew’s fantastic punk rock porn sites. The first to receive the full Pink treatment was POV Punx, a site devoted entirely to thrusting you in the virtual hot seat and providing drool-worthy views of Kylee Kross, Misti Dawn, Kleio Valentein and other Burning Angels in scenes of face, snatch, and ass-fucking awesomeness.

Those of you who’ve been paying special attention to recent trends would’ve surely noticed the increased presence of “alternative” girls in porn both softcore and hardcore, on sites like Suicide Girls and God’s Girls, all over the Tumblr-verse, and even on relatively mainstream adult sites like Brazzers and Bang Bros. While Burning Angel is obviously the place to go for hardcore pornstars with tattoos, piercings, and absurdly colored hair, and POV Punx offers as intimate an experience with such girls as the Internet is currently capable of, those who want something a bit more tangible can turn to Nasstoys and its newest male sexual aid products.

FukPussy Pierced Nipples and FukPussy Pierced Vagina might seem like fairly bizarre objects to sink your shaft into but when you consider that they allegedly feel “better than real REALSKIN” and include a push-button bullet vibrator to offer vibrating orgasms, fucking a pierced pile of anatomically inaccurate flesh-colored thermoplastic rubber doesn’t seem like such a bad idea; and, hey, used in conjunction with POV Punx, the FukPussy might have you convinced you’ve just bagged yourself some real goth-punk pussy.

Brazzers Jumps Into Action

While it’s always a treat to go back and take another look at a site or network that had previous made a profoundly positive impression on yours truly, it’s even better when the site or network in question has made a huge leap in production quality, audio-visual quality, design, or usability. In the case of the Brazzers network, the first three couldn’t really have been much improved upon, but with the addition of a feature called Jump to Action, Brazzers now allows its stream-friendly viewers to head straight to the part of a scene that most appeals to their unique pornographic predilections.

Brazzers’ Jump to Action menu sits below all newly added scenes and shows, in the case of London Keyes’ recent ‘Invading Your Priv-Assy’ scene for Big Butts Like it Big, every act the delightful Asian-American pornstar performed with Mick Blue. From initial Blowjob to Spanking and a hot Side Fuck all the way to the Gaping brought on by Mick’s thick cock. Hovering your cursor over one of these markers shows a preview thumbnail of that moment in the video and, of course, when you click a marker you’re shot straight to that part of the scene. Nice development, huh?

So, if you’ve been putting off another month inside the Brazzers world because you love how Monique Alexander fucks but hate the way she blows, or you’re of otherwise perfect Charley Chase cocksucking scenes turning into blandly vanilla sex, or even if you just want to beat your meat fast and furiously to a clip of your favorite girl taking a load in the mouth over and over and over again, Jump to Action has you covered.

Halloween Hoochies and Costumed Coochies

Halloween has come and gone for another year, leaving us full of candy, a little headachey from one too many Corpse Reviver cocktails, and sick to fucking death of Bobby “Boris” Pickett. So, how best to wind down in the days following everyone’s favorite costume ‘n’ candy holiday? By judging a costume contest, of course! After much deliberation amongst our judges – that’d be my artistic sensibilities and my libido – Mr. Pink’s is proud to present our three finalists for Best Costumed Pornstar for Halloween 2011.

Pornstars seem to love getting all gussied up for Halloween and this year was no exception. At Naughty America, Julia Ann decked herself out in a genie costume, fulfilling many a viewer’s wish as she went to town on Michael Vegas’ dick-in-a-box.

This year, Joanna Angel’s annual Halloween production was a filthy yet funny reinterpretation of the classic horror story, Frankenstein. Decked out in, well, barely anything really, Joanna lit up the black-and-white screen as the Bride of Frankenstein, complete with an incredible two-tone bouffant hairdo!

Joanna Angel

Our last contestant comes from a country that celebrates Halloween, or “Alla Helgons Dag”, for a full week, putting our one night of lunacy to shame. Buxom Swedish goddess Puma Swede sure knows how to party, throwing on a supremely slutty nurses uniform, jumping in the Bang Bus, and cruising around for cock, gobbling up every testicular treat thrown her way.

There can, of course, be only one winner and this year it seems clear that the pornstar who put the most effort, creativity, and enthusiasm into her costume was the one and only Joanna Angel. If ever there was a pornstar made for Halloween-themed smut, it’s Joanna. Head on over to Joanna’s official Burning Angel site now and scope out her absurdist horror-porn masterpiece, Fuckenstein!