Mr. Pink's Blog

Beatin’ on a Bargain! with Videobox

Videobox isn’t just known as one of the ‘net’s most plentiful adult websites – and rightfully so with its 17,000 DVD titles and 94,000 individual scenes – it’s also regarded as one of the best deals a porn fan can find online. With a regular monthly price of $15, Videobox has long been affordable and well worth its fairly meager cost, but even lower prices awaited those willing to devote themselves to six months of membership at $10-a-month, or twelve months at $8-a-month. Now, however, there’s one more Videobox membership package that’s by far the most difficult to refuse and it includes one of my favorite pieces of tech to hit my household in the past five years.

Videobox is currently partnering with Roku and offering confident new signees a brand-new and totally free Roku device ($49.99 value) with which to stream Videobox’s best content straight to their HD TV. Ringing in at the exact same monthly cost ($8) as Videobox’s 12-month package but requiring an 18-month commitment, this plan not only gives you the full benefit of Videobox membership, it throws it some your flatscreen for, say, life-size Jenna Haze POV blowjobs! And you can use Roku to stream Netflix and Crackle and HBO and Not convinced that this is the bangingest porno deal on the ‘net and need more rigid proof? Protect your pockets and come with me then, nerdlinger.

The Math:
Holding almost 17,000 DVD titles featuring 94,000 individual scenes, as well as 280,000 member-created clips, Videobox is one of the largest, most endless enjoyable adult websites on the ‘net. Although you can upgrade your membership to include any of the seven premium channels (Evil Angel, Kink, Club Tranny etc), the basic Videobox package is bound to keep most members very, very happy. And, breaking down to about 4c USD per DVD and less than 1c per scene, you’re not going to find more bang for your buck – and some insanely stellar (and varied) bang it is, too – anywhere but nestled in Videobox’s warm and loving bosom. (And, since Videobox is available on mobile devices as well as desktops and Roku, it’s a totally portable bosom, to boot!)

(Just beware of the pre-selected Mr. Skin offer on the Videobox sign-up page; leave it ticked and you will two days later be charged the equivalent cost of more than two months at Videobox! Don’t say I didn’t warn ya.)

Lust Lost – Missy Pink’s Sex Advice

Missy Pink,

I can sum up my problem in three words, I hate sex. Well, maybe hate is too strong of a word, but, it’s just not something I need or most of the time, even want in my life. I’ve never had the type of orgasm that will make your eyes roll back in your head like I read of in my romance novels, and it seems like a waste of time. I wasn’t a virgin when I married my husband 14 years ago, so, it’s not that he’s doing something wrong, I just have no excitement over it, so, I fake my lack of desire from him.

Lust Lost

Dear Friend;

You may have been able to sum things up in three words as to your cause for writing me, but, whether you know it or not, you’ve actually voiced more than one issue to me.

First of all, you’ve been married for 14 years, which means your spouse knows you much better than you think. There are certain senses that develop over the years when you live with someone, somewhere between the richer and poorer, and in sickness and in health, there’s an unstated clause of during orgasm and faked arousal, so yes, I would think he knows, and, if he’s picking up on your receptors of boredom and duty instead of desire, he’s probably feeling that he is the problem, he’s not exciting you enough to have you writhing across the sheets, saturating them in your female juices.

I’ve said it before, but it still rings true, the mind is the largest sex organ of the body, and, if you’ve convinced yourself that no amount of stimulation in the world will have you squirting during foreplay, then, it won’t. You’ve literally talked yourself out of the erotica.

You also spoke of being an avid fan of romance novels, which is fine for nighttime reading when sleep won’t come, but, you won’t cum either if you feel that life is like what’s written upon those pages. It’s fiction, and yes, real romance can be just as passionate at times, but, I think you’re setting your expectations too high, using the characters in your books as the way things should be.

You need to talk to your husband. Granted, it won’t be easy, it’s not as if you’re telling him you’ve suddenly developed a dislike for broccoli, this is much bigger. However, the only thing larger is allowing your husband to feel as though he’s failing you, and by doing so, you’re also failing yourself, there’s juicy jubilance that can be found in the bedroom, but, you need to open your mind and your thighs too it, along with your husband’s eyes of what you’ve been experiencing. If he feels inadequate, he may begin looking for another woman to prove his worth with, and, 14 years of marriage is a lot to throw away over you faking during fornication.

If you truly dislike the act of hardcore sex itself, then be honest with him, but, if there is an ember burning that just needs to be stoked through reality to gain full flame, then, give it a chance. Put your book down and pick up your vibrator, get in touch with yourself. Relax, let your eyes roll back and then experience the wonders with the man you exchanged vows with.

Create-a-Mate for the Holidays

From 4th millennium renderings of Ancient Egyptian fertility god Min to Cynthia Plaster Caster to The Lex Steele PowerLock Cock, casting the human penis in a firm substance, whether stone, iron, glass or RealSkin, and revering it as a symbol of fertility and erotic potency has been part of mankind’s collective sexual culture throughout recorded history. So, if you’ve found yourself in need of a last minute gift for that special bottom in your life and you want to ensure it’s something that’ll come in handy, something you can both enjoy, something that’ll make for a memorable start to the new year, why not cast your willy to the wind, savvy shopper, and consider adding yourself to history’s museum of penises.

Create-a-Mate might sound like the name of a company producing futuristic sexbots you can assemble at home, but it is instead known around the world for leading the way in at-home penile reproduction kits. Allowing soldiers’ wives comfort during long stretches at the homefront, temporary lovers to always hold a keepsake, and the sexually frustrated to fuck their idols, fake dicks are always big hits, so why not throw yours under the Christmas tree? Not only does Create-a-Mate offer suction-cupped, strap-on, vibrating and handle-equipped versions of their famous penis cloning kits, they could also, quite frankly, use some help.

When Hurricane Sandy tore through the East Coast in October of 2012, she didn’t spare Create-a-Mate. The company’s New Jersey warehouses and offices suffered four feet of water. After relocating to Florida for support from associates, Create-a-Mate has returned to the NY area and begun rebuilding its cock-cloning empire starting with these latest, more advanced endeavors. (See, you’d be doing it for charity, too.)

Elegant Angel’s Performers of the Year 2014

Every year, at the end of every year, one of US porn’s most prominent and respected studios, Elegant Angel, releases its Performers of the Year DVD. Gathering together the most dazzling performers of the past twelve months, Performers of the Year 2014 sees Maddy O’Reilly, Riley Reid, Remy LaCroix, Bonnie Rotten, and 2013 AVN Female Performer of the Year Skin Diamond for six scenes of hardcore thrills above and beyond the level of most adult endeavors seen in 2013. A directorial collaboration between Toni Ribas, Carlos Dee, Mimefreak and Elegant Angel’s latest superstar director, Asa Akira, herself a three-time featured Performer of the Year.

“Waitasecond,” you interject, “six scenes? But there’s only five girls!” Well, on the latest Elegant Angel podcast, Veruca James regales the hosts with a story about shooting a scene for the release with Riley Reid. Something of a bonus two-girl treat in an otherwise hetero-only fuckfest, the scene had Toni Ribas struggling to keep his two stars in line. After spending all day flirting and working themselves up, Riley and Veruca were disappointed to discover their director only wanted one of them to lap at the other’s pussy; Veruca would get Riley off but wouldn’t get off herself. Furious, they stood together and insisted that they both deserved some relief. Faced with two lingerie-clad beauties foaming at the mouth and clawing at each other, Ribas relented. Veruca’s unsure whether her orgasm will be included in the final cut, but either way it’s clear she’s as excited for its release as, well, basically every porn fan on the planet.

A street date for Performers of the Year 2014 will be released soon from Elegant Angel.