With Halloween at our heels – and the Mr. Pink’s blogs to prove it – we’re indulging in more fresh reviews of classic porn sites that somehow manage to stay fresh year after year. Well, Sexy Hub is fairly new and not yet a classic, but it’s showing ample promise with its five UK/Euro sites. Nubiles, however, has been around for ages and still brings the heat with hot young beauties in solo, sapphic, and straight scenes. Gamma Entertainment networks Mile High Media and Fame Digital, each hosting a handful of pornstar and/or network sites, proved the most essential of this week. With huge archives, a strong HD showing, and top talent of today and yesterday, they’re at the height of their respective powers right now. Speaking of powerful, if you’re still hungry for Halloween porno, dig my blogs on what Burning Angel and Brazzers cooked up for die-hard horror-porn fans this year and then pull yourself back here for more on the best (and worst) the online porn world has to offer, only at Mr. Pink’s!
Joanna Angel and her Burning Angel crew may have concocted the most extravagant and outrageous Halloween porno epic this year but another legendary producer of weird and wonderful porno parodies, lampoons, homages, and tributes, Brazzers, instead opted for smaller individual episodes, each tailored to a particular theme, kinky costume, or outlandish Halloween-related setup. Roping in Ariana Marie, Mercedes Carrera, Rachel RoXXX, and Zoey Monroe to commit heinous acts of hardcore carnality, Brazzers unleashed a tight quartet of Halloween porno scenes.
October 29th saw the arrival of Zoey Monroe playing a wantonly slutty kitten who ditches her boyfriend at a party to fuck the Scream-mask-sporting host, Michael Vegas. Not to be outdone by Brazzers Exztra’s initial Halloween offering, Big Tits at Work unveiled the following day Rachel RoXXX in The Office Mummy. Danny D. arrives at work without a Halloween costume and quickly wraps himself in toilet paper to avoid embarrassment. What he can’t avoid is being fired by Ms. RoXXX, though it seems she has costume problems all her own.
Twenty-something fan-favorite Ariana Marie donned a black witches outfit and settled in for a night of handing out candy to kiddies alone as her husband sleeps in another room. When Johnny Castle stops by to make a last-gasp attempt at candy hoarding, his age proves a problem for Ariana, who wants to give out a lot more than just candy corn. Brazzers Extra delivered the final ZZ Halloween horn-fest, this time gussying up Mercedes Carrera in the best porno rendition of a Vampirella costume yet. A character known largely for her outfit, not her personality or history, the role of Vampirella allows Carrera to bare her fangs both literally and figuratively, as she dives on civilian Michael Vegas and threatens to betray her vow of not harming humans. Will she drain her victim’s arteries or just his balls?
From comic book vampiresses to oddly unidentifiable military-styled costumes with super-heavy cleavage, from trick-or-treating turned one-night-stands to office costume parties cum fluid-sharing sessions, Brazzers knows how to deliver the good on Halloween and 2016 is yet another notch in Brazzers’ All Hallows Hardcore belt.
As Halloween approaches every year, the entire city of Los Angeles seems to buzz with enthusiasm and anticipation, both for the long-standing traditional debauchery the festival now encourages, but also the creative element most commonly associated with the often elaborate costumes revelers dress themselves in as a means of escaping the confines of their everyday reality. Few creative icons in Hollywood have shown as deep an appreciation and love for Halloween than the one and only princess of punk-porn herself, Ms. Joanna Angel. Along with her Burning Angel cast and crew, a family really, Joanna has crafted many memorable adult epics specifically for the Halloween season and this year, well, this year they’ve put their nasty little heads together and come up with something truly devilish.
Cindy Queen of Hell, starring Leigh Raven in the title role and a cast of Burning Angel regulars, tells the story of Cindy and her mother (Joanna Angel), the elder having some 21 years earlier conceived her daughter with the devil himself (Xander Corvus). Now that Cindy has reached adulthood, she’s faced with a choice: remain on Earth or join her pops to rule the underworld.
As has proven to be the case in the past, Burning Angel throws everything it can into each of its major epics, Cindy’s tale being no exception. From comically tacky effects (a BA specialty) to extensive demon makeup that turns Sarah Jessie, Anna Bell Peaks, Lily Lane, Nikki Hearts, and Ophelia Rain into ravenous netherworld nymphs hell bent on turning Cindy into the daughter her daddy always hoped for. For us, the home viewers, that means just as much, if not more utter sexual insanity from Joanna and Co. Ms. Angel DPs women with her demon beau, takes two satanic cocks at a time,
One part even the most ardent Burning Angel fans may have missed is footage torn from the film’s live concert scene in which Satan himself fronts a dark-wave band and performs the original song Wake Up in Hell, capturing the attention of a certain pink-and-black-haired woman in the front row.
Unveiled to Burning Angel’s online subscribers over the last two weeks and now online in its complete five-part form, Cindy Queen of Hell has also hit the stores in DVD form, proving evil knows no format restriction.