Darkko Dives Into Kalina

When the 2017 AVN Award nominations rolled out in November of last year, there was one name this porn critic was fully expecting to see threatening the supposed shoe-in winners of the major female awards. An absolute queen of fellatio known for her messiness and deepthroating skills while also an accomplished and very convincing girl-girl performer with a solid record of awesome hetero hardcore to seal the deal, Kalina Ryu only popped up in one category and shared her nomination for Best Group Sex Scene with Mick Blue, Anikka Albrite, and Vicki Chase. Could the industry really be so blind as to largely ignore one of the most gleefully slutty hardcore performers to come along in years? Then I realized what it was… Kalina Ryu doesn’t do anal.

Kalina Ryu

Actually, let me correct myself, Kalina Ryu didn’t perform anal sex onscreen until very recently, Jonni Darkko, king of cumshots and POV, casting her in a pair of features that honored the athletic “half-Korean, half-Welsh” beauty’s complete devotion to sex. In Fitness Sluts, Darkko worked Kalina over with the aid of her saliva glands and open throat, and a massive black dildo incredibly worked inside the starlet for a pseudo-DPP. Sliding a thumb, a finger, then two into his frequent collaborator’s asshole, Darkko is eventually allowed a brief dip of his cock in the very same place, marking Kalina’s first on-screen penile-anal penetration after an immense amount of butt-play and teasing.

“It’s so fun to get all dolled up, feeling glamorous, pretty, confident, sexy, and then to get completely destroyed,” Kalina told AVN, reflecting on her work with Darkko. “To stop caring about anything else in that time, other than being a submissive, dirty Slutty Angel, a deep throating, ball-sucking, ass-licking, makeup-smeared, cum-greedy, deliriously happy whore. No shame for how disgusting, because you’re floating from having your brains fucked out. When you feel cum-dumb from multiple orgasms, and exhausted, and hungry after, you know that was a good one.”

Oddly touted by AVN as Kalina’s first anal outing, the Slutty Angels scene in question has just been released through Evil Angel and once again sees the 32-year-old and her director joined by a hefty black dildo for an intense 91-minute lipstick-smearing, DP and DPP heavy, sweaty-as-hell, multiple-load-producing fuck-fest that well and truly cements Kalina as a new anal debutant to watch. The ass-fucking in Slutty Angels is once again brief. After all the build up – from her own fingers diving in while glancing over her shoulder in a POV doggy clip or bending over and inviting Manuel Ferrara to pry her tightest hole open with his lubed digits – you might expect her to go all-out and take it anally from start to finish. Kalina Ryu, however, knows exactly what she’s doing.

She’s driving us all fucking wild, that’s what she’s doing.

Double Discount: Lubed and Holed

Lubed Holed

There comes a time in every porn lover’s life when he (or she) is presented with a seemingly impossible decision. Whether a result of tightening one’s financial belt or a matter of practicality, making a choice between two avenues of pornographic inquiry can be damn tough. And when the two options in question are near-identical takes on two thriving porno niches, produced to the highest possible A/V standards, starring devastating newbie pornstars as daring as they are darling, man, that’s not a decision I’d relish having to make.

Two brand-new sites focusing on anal sex and oil-aided massage encounters present a largely POV take on hardcore sex. Lubed takes us down by the poolside to slather up young female figures with lotion and oil, paying close attention to every curve and crevice and every positive physical reaction she shares. Well stocked with threesomes, milk baths, flexibility fetishism, and lusty, steamy bathroom scenes, Lubed ensures every lithe model glistens as she’s fucked for your viewing pleasure not just in 720p and 1080p HD videos, but in amazing 4K Ultra-HD, too!

Holed, on the other hand, ventures into its models’ back passages, spreading their tightest holes open, encouraging modest gapes, and finally filling or painting her with enough seed to sow a few thousand little future sexual deviants. Starring in these POV-heavy scenes, Samantha Rone, Holly Hendrix, Dakota Skye, Rebel Lynn, and Angel Smalls – many of the same models from Lubed.

Presented not as a co-existing pair but as standalone sites loosely connected to Passion HD’s roster of hardcore outlets, Lubed and Holed are an intriguing proposition at their usual price of $29.95-a-month each, but now with Mr. Pink scoring discount deals that get you one month inside each of these immensely promising, super-HQ sites for just $17.95. Considering how many adult sites now push beyond $35, $45, even $50 for access, paying $35.90 for a pair of vicarious sexual powerhouses like Lubed and Holed isn’t an option you’ll want to ignore.

Anal Advice Assessed

Valentina Nappi

Since arriving on the international porn scene in 2011 and making waves in the US industry thanks to her relentless pursuit of personal pleasure, devotion to full gender equality, or fondness for shooting anal, DP, and gangbang scenes, Italian goddess Valentina Nappi has become one of the more salient commentators on the ins-and-outs of the porn world. So, when GQ published a slightly disturbing article entitled “How to Ask for Anal Sex” only to then be followed by a red-pen wielding Complex writer who pointed out its numerous flaws and falsehoods – “Women like to be surprised,” claims GQ, but that doesn’t extend to surprise buttsecks! – we turned to the esteemed Ms. Nappi for her advice, compared it to that of GQ and Complex, and tried to figure out which source was providing the real assistance to anally-inclined readers. Guess who came out on top?

GQ writer, “sex expert” and hostess, Sarah Jane Banahan suggests forgoing mentioning or requesting an anal attempt in advance, telling readers to “undress her slowly, kiss her, tell her quietly that you are going to penetrate her from behind.” Yeah, kinda like that disturbing scene from The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo! Complex, for its part, wanted answers and turned to sexologist Bianca Laureano to get them. “Articles like this are dangerous because they give men the impression they may do something sexual with a partner without their consent.” Real anal sex, dear readers, is nothing like a porn scenario. You don’t start out with heavy petting, say “Turn over, baby,” then dive in cock-first. What you want to do is follow the advice of someone who’s been on the receiving end of many an butt-hungry penis in her time, Ms. Valentina Nappi.

In a blog post entitled How to Do Anal, Valentina lays it out as clearly as anyone anal adventurer could want. First, she details cleanliness protocols, discussing how to administer an enema and how pornstars stay clean on set. Some take psyllium whole husks for a fiber blast thrice daily before a shoot while others take Imodium (“not a healthy decision,” she says), but Valentina herself simply reduces fiber intake prior to a shoot to ensure she’s not leaking all over the set, the props, and her co-stars come the day of the shoot. Lubrication is next on Ms. Nappi’s checklist and, boy, is she through, a far cry from the lube-less anal attempts outlined in GQ. Size is also discussed, with Nappi insisting that every ass is different and can accommodate objects of different sizes. Crucially, she points out that the average length of the human rectum ranges from 10cm to 15cm and anything larger than that may end up smashing your colon, potentially resulting in Depends dependency.

Sure, GQ and even Complex’s guides to anal sex lacked the casual language Nappi uses, aiming for a more scientific-sounding approach to anal preparation, but really, at the end of the day which would you trust, the male equivalent of Cosmopolitan, a hip-hop-oriented youth culture magazine, or someone who takes cocks in their ass for a living and is comfortable, confident, and casually serious enough about the safety of her fans’ and fans’ lovers’ assholes that she’d even post a little infographic to help identify the (literal) shit you don’t wanna know about, as well as the (proverbial) shit you absolutely need to know before plunging your boner deep inside a surprisingly sensitive little passage.

Valentina Nappi @ HardX