Pokémon Porn Persists

Pornstar Go: a XXX Parody

Since its July 6 release, augmented reality game Pokémon Go has captured the imaginations (and free time) of millions of players worldwide. As Mr. Pink’s reported to you last week, the game has also captured the imagination of pornographers both amateur and pro. After we previously noted Pokémon-themed porn efforts from Team Skeet’s Exxxtra Small and Teen Pies, RK (Reality Kings) Prime, and Cosplay Babes, another wave of Poké-porn arrived to further milk the world’s reigning gaming trend.

Arguably the king of porn parody mountain, Brazzers didn’t spare any costuming expenses for its Pornstar Go: a XXX Parody production, the results of which went live on Monday. Replacing the super powered pocket monsters with magical pornstars who vanish from porn sets across the valley, Brazzers has Spanish newcomer Jordi El Niño Polla hunting for Ella Hughes, Patty Michova, and Alexa Tomas in an effort to return them to their rightful homes at Brazzers HQ. A trio of women this irresistible shouldn’t need any extra incentive to pursue, but once captured, they reveal their true animalistic intentions.

Taking a less fantastic angle on Poké-porn, Bryan Gozzling’s Hookup Hotshot site brought to our attention a skinny raven-haired Ivy Aura. Keeping with Gozzling’s social media focus, Ivy is recruited to accompany our host on some Pokémon Go hunts only to find he’s far more interested in fingering her asshole, urinating in her mouth, and unloading his seed onto her expectant face – and they don’t even get around to catching any Pokémon!

While it’s unlikely this is the last of the Pokémon parody porn coming your way in this time of near-global Poké-fever, it’s clearer than ever that a pop-culture phenomenon doesn’t require any greater inclusion in porn than a brief reference made by jaw-dropping new starlet. (But hey, check out Ella Hughes in costume – that sure doesn’t hurt!)

Brazzers review

More Halloween Happenings

Not long now, fuck fans, and every North American adult website worth a damn will be coloring its homepage black-and-orange, placing glowing pumpkin heads at every entrance, and only admitting those women who’ve come dressed for the occasion, every inner-slut’s favorite over-commercialized holiday, Halloween!

Along with the epic pornstar-attended party planned by AVN and due to open a inter-dimensional gateway to a fiery den of adult industry decadence – more info here – there’s also another big-time Halloween bash from a champion of sexual expression, New York’s Museum of Sex. Teaming with One Year Lease Theater Company for the October 31st event, the Museum will host costume contests, complimentary cocktails, light dining, raffles, live music from NY “indie, gypsy-ish, cabaret-ish, parlor rock” outfit Kotorino, and many more events, activities, tricks, and treats to put attendees in the partying mood. And, as always, there’s a premium VIP package for those that want to elevate themselves above the riff-raff, this time dubbed the ‘Indulge with Dionysus’ package and priced at $125 (alongside $65 and $40 standard VIP and general admission tickets, aka ‘Mingle with the Gods’ and ‘Soar with Aphrodite’). Dionysion acolytes willing to part with $125 for a Halloween party par excellence receive, among other pleasures, burlesque performances, a martini bar, appointed servers, ‘sinful party favors and decadent treats’, as well as the best seats in the house reserved for their asses and their asses alone.

Also getting into the spooky spirit this Halloween is everyone’s favorite proponents of martial infidelity, Kelly and Ryan Madison. Just released from Juicy Entertainment, Whore-ers of Halloween sees Natasha Vega, Casey Calvert, Staci Silverstone, Veruca James, Tysen Rich, and Luna C. Kitsuen all gussied up in sultry costumes and given the chance to milk Mr. Madison of his now infamous multiple loads. Cast as the meat in a Madison sandwich set in an Eyes Wide Shut-inspired Venetian-style occult orgy, Veruca James gets the couple to herself for a scene, as do Misses Kitsuen and Vega while the other starlets make do with Ryan alone, though that’s hardly a consolation prize.

Whore-ers of Halloween

And then there’s the horrific Donna T. Rumpshaker costume for women, unwisely produced by outlandish costumers Yandy, which can now be purchased for $69.95. Yes, seriously, and that’s not including the wig or baseball cap!

Donna T. Rumpshaker

Really, the less said about why anyone would possibly want to purchase such a costume for anything other than a woefully unfunny topical reference the better. Isn’t Yandy a “sexy costume” site? Surely even Trump’s staunchest supporters wouldn’t fuck a female doppelganger of the uncouth real estate mogul, would they?

Truly, truly scary ruminations here, folks, and there’s more to come from Mr. Pink’s as we inch closer and closer to All Hallows’ Eve.

Dogfart’s Political Parodies Trump All

Prominent interracial hardcore network network and purveyors of aggressive racially-charged blowbangs, cuckold scenes, and epic “takedowns” of white girls by black guys, black girls by white guys, and black and white girls by each other, the impossibly stupidly named Dogfart Network might still be shaking off its poor choice of handle, but it has a very special ace up its sleeve, an ace that had seemingly gone the way of the dodo and Ford Edsel: absurdist interracial political parody!

dogfart's trumped

Targeting noted resort and casino magnate, reality television star, anti-immigration campaigner, and current candidate for the Republican nomination for President of the United States of America, one Mr. Donald J. Trump for its latest politically-themed parody, Megyn gets Trumped. Shot for Blacks on Blondes and made live August 18th, twelve days after the first Republican debate took place in Cleveland and ignited a feud between candidate Trump and moderator and Fox News pundit (and conservative babe) Megyn Kelly after Kelly asked Trump about previously made statements disparaging women’s appearances. After a stern back-and-forth that not only increased Trump’s profile and popularity, but the outrage directed at him by many left-leaners and women, the battle was well and truly established, with both parties taking to social media to vent their frustrations. Where many would’ve crumbled, Kelly stood her ground, reportedly saying “It’s okay, I’m a big girl, I can take it.” And take it she did.

Dogfart’s epic Megyn Gets Trumped not only see James Bartholet playing the real-estate tycoon but the remarkable Cherie DeVille in the role of Ms. Kelly. Always straight to the point, “The Donald” brings in two hung-as-fuck black bulls to prove to his new (and very foxy) nemesis that, as he implied during the debate, women are best on their knees. Avoiding another verbal assault from Kelly, this time in the green room, The Donald stands back and watches as Kelly loses control and opens herself up for a slamming more aggressive than any thrown her way by Trump-supporters post-debate. Although I’m glad Dogfart is getting in early with the first notable parody of the 2016 presidential election campaign season, but I can’t help but anticipate the next phase of parodies. Will Barack leave Hillary a stiff, black, vibrating replica of himself in the Oval Office? Will Democratic hopeful Bernie Sanders invite rumored running mate Elizabeth Warren over for a chat, provide her with free contraception, assure her of pay equal to an equivalent man, then ask her to prove her dedication to achieving racial harmony by draining the balls of fifteen or twenty black guys? Dear Gods of Dogfart, please hear my prayer!