Now that Sony Pictures has cancelled all release plans for the controversial Seth Rogen, James Franco comedy The Interview, prospective fans are wondering if the film will find another life after the nightmare of its proposed theatrical release. North Korean supreme leader, King Jong Un has denied his government had connection to an invasive hack that brought Sony Pictures to its digital knees, a connection strongly suggested by media pundits. Americans are rightfully concerned that Sony’s bowing to the wishes of a cyber-terrorist group, no matter how dubious their origins, sets a precedent for erasing our hard-won freedom to laugh at whatever the fuck we want. And that, dear reader, is something Larry Flynt of Hustler Magazine holds very, very dear.
Telling the Hollywood Reporter that he’d “spent a lifetime fighting for the First Amendment,” and declaring that “no foreign dictator is going to take away [his] right to free speech,” Flynt announced This Ain’t The Interview XXX, his company’s parody version of the doomed political comedy. “If Kim Jong Un and his henchmen were upset before, wait till they see the movie we’re going to make.”
And, whaddya know, it appears President Obama might be right on Flynt’s side this time: “We cannot have a society in which some dictators someplace can start imposing censorship here in the United States because if somebody is able to intimidate us out of releasing a satirical movie, imagine what they start doing once they see a documentary that they don’t like or news reports that they don’t like. That’s not who we are. That’s not what America is about.”
No, he’s right. America’s about tits. Lots and lots of tits. (And maybe some heavy duty ass, too!)
Anyone who has sat and watched their favorite show’s entire run with back-to-back episodes in a single Netflix binge will know how devoted we can be to pop-culture in all its forms. Porn parodies, although fading from relevance thanks to more current trends – like the American adult industry and its fans collectively cumming in their trousers the current (and kinda creepy) pseudo-incest craze – are still something of a hot commodity in the adult entertainment world. So much so that Sex.com blogger Chico Dusty has come up with a list of his Top Ten Porn Parodies of 2014 to remind us all that there’s still life left in the old genre yet.
DreamZone Entertainment seems to be coming out on top this year, at least according to Dusty, who ranks The Little Spermaid (dir: Jordan Septo), Cape Fear XXX (dir: Bonnie Rotten), and Rambone XXX: A DreamZone Porn Parody (dir: Septo). Axel Braun hasn’t fallen from his spot as the leading porn parody director and 2014 saw him release Spider-Man XXX 2, Cinderella XXX, and This Ain’t Game of Thrones XXX for Vivid, Wicked, and Hustler respectively. (For Dusty’s complete top ten – what, no love for One Flew Over the Cuckold’s Next, really?)
Although unique entries like Miley May’s first cover feature, the Miley Cyrus-spoofing Molly’s Wrecking Ballz and and Not Jersey Boys XXX (a genuine porn parody musical) made for some interesting viewing, most of the parodies included in Dusty’s list fit the usual bill: superheroes, perverted takes on Disney characters, and two Scorsese movies lampooned in a most lusty style. Fun, sure, but not exactly ground-breaking.
Are porn parodies growing stale or are they gradually getting better, bolder, and more outrageous? Perhaps 2015 will hold the answer, but if Axel Braun’s got anything to say about it it’ll be all spandex sporting sexual spoofs of waning interest to so many porn fans. Is pseudo-incest set to burst into the mainstream the way parodies did a few years back? Will they take over as porn virgins’ first viewings or is something else, something even more risque and tantalizingly taboo on the horizon?
Whatever the case, whether it shuffles off to let pseudo-taboo themes take center-stage or is reinvigorated by new talent and new ideas, 2015 is going to be an interesting year for parody porn.
The Arnold Schwarzenegger sci-fi vehicle Total Recall was released in 1990 and remade in 2012 and both movies feature the brief appearance of a woman with three breasts, an alien creature hell bent on being fondled by a three-handed man (or maybe three one-handed men). Although Kaitlyn Leeb (the actress playing the role in director Les Wiseman’s 2012 remake) courted controversy when she wandered around San Diego Comic Con with her three fake tits almost completely exposed, it took a full 14 years for someone to take such strong inspiration from the three-boobed woman that she’d attach a third breast to her own chest, going through 50 plastic surgeons before finally finding one who’d agree to the absurd procedure. The kicker, though, is that Florida massage therapist Jasmine Tridevil claims to have opted for a third breast to make herself “unattractive to men”.
Clearly not thinking her body modification nor the motivation behind it through very thoroughly, Tridevil seems to have forgotten that heterosexual men will do almost anything for access to a pleasing pair of breasts. For three, why, they’d attempt to colonize Mars singlehandedly. How she hopes to shirk male attention is… well… they’re fake. Obviously.
Aside from videos showing off her new rack in a tri-kini, answering questions from interested parties, and claiming that the unemployed are jobless by choice alone, Tridevil’s YouTube channel fails to provide any evidence to support her claims of authentic third-boobery. What does appear, though, are links to news items refuting her claims and the following interview with Tampa’s WTSP:
I suppose we’ll find out the truth when Tridevil’s self-produced reality show is eventually picked up by MTV (which she seems convinced will happen any day now). Episode six allegedly contains footage of the “star” walking along a beach in the same tri-kini she modeled in multiple YouTube videos as well as on WTSP News, when she told reporter Charles Billi she’s willing to do anything to become famous. While Tridevil’s new appendage may remain under suspicion, she’ll have her chance to tell the whole truth when (or better said, if) her show hits TV screens everywhere.