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Brazzers Jumps Into Action

While it’s always a treat to go back and take another look at a site or network that had previous made a profoundly positive impression on yours truly, it’s even better when the site or network in question has made a huge leap in production quality, audio-visual quality, design, or usability. In the case of the Brazzers network, the first three couldn’t really have been much improved upon, but with the addition of a feature called Jump to Action, Brazzers now allows its stream-friendly viewers to head straight to the part of a scene that most appeals to their unique pornographic predilections.

Brazzers’ Jump to Action menu sits below all newly added scenes and shows, in the case of London Keyes’ recent ‘Invading Your Priv-Assy’ scene for Big Butts Like it Big, every act the delightful Asian-American pornstar performed with Mick Blue. From initial Blowjob to Spanking and a hot Side Fuck all the way to the Gaping brought on by Mick’s thick cock. Hovering your cursor over one of these markers shows a preview thumbnail of that moment in the video and, of course, when you click a marker you’re shot straight to that part of the scene. Nice development, huh?

So, if you’ve been putting off another month inside the Brazzers world because you love how Monique Alexander fucks but hate the way she blows, or you’re of otherwise perfect Charley Chase cocksucking scenes turning into blandly vanilla sex, or even if you just want to beat your meat fast and furiously to a clip of your favorite girl taking a load in the mouth over and over and over again, Jump to Action has you covered.

Halloween Hoochies and Costumed Coochies

Halloween has come and gone for another year, leaving us full of candy, a little headachey from one too many Corpse Reviver cocktails, and sick to fucking death of Bobby “Boris” Pickett. So, how best to wind down in the days following everyone’s favorite costume ‘n’ candy holiday? By judging a costume contest, of course! After much deliberation amongst our judges – that’d be my artistic sensibilities and my libido – Mr. Pink’s is proud to present our three finalists for Best Costumed Pornstar for Halloween 2011.

Pornstars seem to love getting all gussied up for Halloween and this year was no exception. At Naughty America, Julia Ann decked herself out in a genie costume, fulfilling many a viewer’s wish as she went to town on Michael Vegas’ dick-in-a-box.

This year, Joanna Angel’s annual Halloween production was a filthy yet funny reinterpretation of the classic horror story, Frankenstein. Decked out in, well, barely anything really, Joanna lit up the black-and-white screen as the Bride of Frankenstein, complete with an incredible two-tone bouffant hairdo!

Our last contestant comes from a country that celebrates Halloween, or “Alla Helgons Dag”, for a full week, putting our one night of lunacy to shame. Buxom Swedish goddess Puma Swede sure knows how to party, throwing on a supremely slutty nurses uniform, jumping in the Bang Bus, and cruising around for cock, gobbling up every testicular treat thrown her way.

There can, of course, be only one winner and this year it seems clear that the pornstar who put the most effort, creativity, and enthusiasm into her costume was the one and only Joanna Angel. If ever there was a pornstar made for Halloween-themed smut, it’s Joanna. Head on over to Joanna’s official Burning Angel site now and scope out her absurdist horror-porn masterpiece, Fuckenstein!

Halloween Roundup Part 2

In yesterday’s spooktacular installment of Mr. Pink’s Blog you read about Brazzers, Bang Bros, and Reality Kings’ attempts to creep you out while keeping you hard this Halloween. Now that The Big Three are outta the way, it’s time to delve even further into this year’s carnal celebrations with sites that cater to, well, a more refined clientele.

It seems only fitting that the masters of domination and subjugation, Kink dot com, would render a highly decadent take on Halloween with Mistress Bobbi Starr and the enslaved Tara Lynn Foxx. On Kink’s anal-focused site, Everything Butt, we find “Anal Haunting” a scene loaded with punishing rectal penetrations, anal stretching and gaping, and extremely potent rough sex. Imagine being Tara this Halloween, awoken from your coffin to a steel dildo-wielding Bobbi Starr! That’s enough to scare the bejeezus outta anyone!

Over at My XXX Pass, relative porno newcomer Jessie Andrews throws on a black and blue wig, sets her pumpkin pail down, and gorges on the biggest sucker she could find: a thick, long, and very stiff dick. Taking it so deep she fully earns her place in Throated’s Halloween update, Jessie gags, spits, tears up, and even tries to talk with her mouthful. Who taught you table manners, girl? Cannibals?!

Still with the orally fixated, the delightfully erotic Camille Crimson might not seem like the type to puke mid-blowjob, soiling her kinky Supergirl costume, that’s because she has perfected The Art of Blowjob. Offering something unique to her fans this Halloween, Camille refuses to take her lover’s cock in her mouth, instead stroking his shaft with licking and sucking his balls as if they were Everlasting Gobstoppers. As he inevitably blows, you’ll surely realize that Camille’s manual and oral skills alone aren’t responsible for his excitement – she’s wearing a pumpkin-orange slip so thin it’s practically see-though. That’d be enough to have any guy aching for some suction!

Quite possibly the most accomplished producer of spooky concept porn is the rather ironically named Joanna Angel. After winning the AVN Award for Best Web Premiere in 2011 for her Halloween parody, Dong of the Dead, this Burning Angel celebrates Halloween ‘11 with the ambitious Fuckenstein! Joanna’s eerie black-and-white parody of the original monster movie stars James Deen as Dr. Frankenstein, Ramon Nomar as The Monster, and Ms. Angel herself as The Bride, complete with lightning-strike bouffant hairdo. The major difference in this version of Mary Shelley’s classic horror tale, of course, is that The Bride takes a double-teaming from The Monster and his creator. A far cry from the social commentary of the original, sure, but a damn sight sexier!

Keep your third eyes peeled, dear readers, ‘cause if more horrific horniness hits the WWW before midnight of the 31st, “Putrid” Mr. Pink’s will have the complete, skin-scorching lowdown. Goreanteed!

Halloween Roundup Part 1

Every October people all around the world eagerly await Halloween, the one day every year when it’s not only acceptable to dress as a demonic sadist, ghetto street hooker, or zombified Captain America, it’s downright expected. The porn industry has always enjoyed some gussied-up Halloween antics and with the rise in popularity of parody porn, adult studios and websites seem even more eared towards presenting a decadent costume play that is strictly for the grown-ups. In this two-part blog, Mr. Pink is going to highlight some of the stunningly spooky pornographic achievements that have come to our attention in the lead up to All Hallow’s Eve.

Those randy rascals the Bang Bros have already added not one, but two Halloween-themed scenes to their highly-rated network, employing Nordic superstar Puma Swede and a quintet of lesbionic hussies for some all-out costumed degeneracy. Featured on Bang Bus, Puma Swede dons a kinky nurses uniform reminiscent of Kill Bill’s Elle Driver and roams around Miami in a pumpkin and spiderweb filled van, pulling random guys off the street and asking them to dump their candy directly into her mouth. It’s all there in “Trick or Treat BITCHES!”

Over at the Bros’ relatively new all-girl site, Party of 3, the sapphic quintet – Alexis Fawx, Mercedes Lynn, Anastasia Morna, Blarie Banks, and the bootylicious Rachel Starr – get together and simply try on some costumes. Although they giddily prance around naked, it’s not until Rachel starts grab-assing whoever is wearing the spandex cop uniform that things get crazy. Forty-odd minutes of finger-banging, clit-licking, dildo-riding, strapon fucking lesbian action later, everyone agree that “Halloween Pussy Party” is one shindig they won’t soon forget.

Never ones to be outdone, Brazzers have pulled out all stops in their high-concept Halloween production, The Sexorcist, starring Sophie Dee, Zoe Voss, and Jordan Ash. Featured on Pornstars Like it Big, The Sexorcist sees supreme British whore Sophie playing a women driven to furious displays of unrestrained sexual aggressiveness by the demon that has possessed her. Concerned roommate Zoe gets caught in the demon’s grasp and suffers multiple squirts to the face, forcing her to call in The Sexorcist himself, Father Ash, in the hopes that this holy man can rid Sophie of her otherworldly affliction before she nails him, too. Somehow I kinda doubt he’s successful.

Staying well within the Earthly realm as it their M.O., Reality Kings throw their own Halloween bash on Money Talks. Resident cocksman Voodo takes to the streets in “Sleeping Booty” to pick up everyday hussies for a debasin’ good time in the RK van. One such girl, Megan Brown, is paid to lay down and allow her snatch to become a 3D canvas as Voodoo creates a snarling werewolf out of her upper thighs, complete with fake fangs between her lower lips. Hey, just because it’s “Reality,” doesn’t mean it has to make sense!

Tune in tomorrow, guys and ghouls, for the further adventures of “Monster” Pink for more sapphic Samhain celebrations and tittyfucking trick-or-treating.