October, 2013 | Mr. Pink's Blog

Aussie Woolworths’ Bad Vibes

Woolworths, Australia’s largest supermarket chain, made a decision last week that will make it more difficult for their everyday shopper, women especially, to leave with a smile on their face. Threatened with a consumer boycott, ‘The Fresh Food People’ agreed to remove Durex Play’s Delight vibrating bullet from its shelves. The opposition to mainstream retail sales of sexual aids is nothing new, but the curious origin of one of the more aggressive complaints is certainly unexpected. Fiona Patten, president of the Australian Sex Party and chief executive of the Eros Association, Australia’s adult industry body, argued that the sale of such aids in supermarkets was patently unfair to adult retailers. “It is unfair that adult shops must jump through myriad hoops to get planing approval and are strictly regulated yet mainstream stores sell the same products without having to adhere to similar regulations.” The regulations of which she speaks include age-restricted admission, a 200 meter proximity limit to schools and churches, and sometimes even blacked-out windows, adding to the already marginalized nature of adult-oriented retail.

Following suit, Coles, another national supermarket chain, has removed from its shelves Durex’s vibrating ring products, citing its awareness of “community concern”. This decision regarding a product with a more flexible target market – although they can and are used by women, the rings were packaged with condoms and clearly aimed at male consumers – comes more than five years after Play Vibrations ring device hit the shelves of grocery stores, pharmacies, and petrol (gas) stations around the country, raising barely an eyebrow on their initial stocking. So, can we deduce these recent withdrawals to be an attack on progressive female sexual awareness? Considering the Sex Party’s stance on freedom of sexual expression, this seems unlikely. Although, the other target of a potential boycott (and possibly legal prosecution) suggests it could be.

Clearly part of a bigger issue concerning Australia’s adult retailers, the Woolworths issue highlighted another outlet from which savvy customers can purchase dildos, vibrators, and many other products from some lingerie stores and pharmacies free from restrictions and regulations. Patten continued, “Adult shops would not stand a chance getting planning permission in such high-traffic precincts [as shopping malls]. Although what the lingerie stores are doing is illegal in many states, I’m yet to hear anyone bringing them to task for it.”

Sexologist Nikki Goldstein has vocally disagreed with the decision of retailers, asking “Why is it so offensive? We are taught to view such products as dirty, naughty, shameful, and outside the boundaries of normality, and that’s wrong. A vibrator is no different to a vitamin in that it does something positive for your body.”

Durex Play vibrating products are still available at pharmacies and adult retailers (and some lingerie stores) around Australia.

Beatin’ on a Budget! with Jules Jordan

Jules Jordan knows about great deals; his entire career could be seen as a carefully constructed means to not only have sex with some of the most vivaciously sexual women alive, but to make ‘mad bank’ doing so. With a porno empire rivaling John “Buttman” Stagliano’s Evil Angel, Jordan has seen everyone from Eve Lawrence and Taylor Wane to Alexis Texas and Abella Anderson step onto his set and deliver astounding performances. And, with well over 30 major industry awards to his credit, from AVNs to XRCOs and everything in between, it seems most everyone in porn agrees: if you want it done right (and very hardcore), you go to Jules.

Jules Jordan Video’s official website, naturally called Jules Jordan, packs a hefty carnal wallop with close to one thousand hardcore scenes of impressive technical, artistic, and, most importantly, sexual merits. Throw in 720p and 1080p HD videos and a strong image archive starring porn’s most thrilling women and most skilled cocksmen – interracial is a specialty and sees Lex Steele and Mandingo destroy dozens upon dozens of pussies – and you’re looking at a great deal even at full price. But with Mr. Pink’s discount bringing one month of Jules Jordan below twenty bucks ($19.95 from $29.95, to be precise), you’d be mad to ignore this golden opportunity to indulge.

The Math:
While quantity certainly isn’t the only thing to consider when joining a porn site, Jules doesn’t do too badly at all. There’s 177 full-length DVDs online, giving up 904 individual scenes and roughly equating to 11c-per-DVD and 2c-per-scene! Plus you get free access to another 88 scenes at Sperm Swallowers! Jules Jordan, you’re my hero!

Explicit Japanese Art on Display at British Museum

Those of you who’ve discovered the often bizarre eroticism posted by hot hipster chicks on Tumblr may be aware of the recent resurgence in a form of erotic art that remained hidden from the West for centuries: octopus-fucking.

– The Dream of the Fisherman’s Wife; Hokusai, 1814

Although certainly not restricted to cephalopod-human relations, the sexually explicit Japanese art form known as shunga (spring pictures) rose to prominence in the Edo period (1603 to 1867) and persists to this day. The British Museum celebrates shunga with a new exhibition of works from such masters of ukiyo-e (woodblock prints and paintings) as Torii Kiyonaga, Kitagawa Utamaro, Hosoda Eishi, and, perhaps the most revered of all classical Japanese artists, Katsushika Hokusai (whose non-erotic print ‘The Great Wave off Kanagawa’ can be found on postcards, napkins, aprons, notebooks, and other knick-knacks in souvenir shops around the world, as well as at the British Museum).

Contemporary artists such as Masami Teraoka, Yuji Moriguchi, and Jeff Faerber are continuing the Shunga tradition and using its form and historical connotations to examine AIDS, contemporary pornography, voyeurism, cultural globalization, and the increasingly self-determined path of female sexual expression. The exhibition at the British Museum, however, keeps its focus on shunga of the past. No less exploratory and celebratory than contemporary works and featuring everything from tentacle-rape fantasies, over-sized genitalia, Buddhist priests fondling their acolytes, samurai orgies, and even the occasional tender and romantic love scene.

‘Shunga: sex and pleasure in Japanese art’ is at the British Museum in London until January 5, 2014. For more information visit the museum’s website or see Ian Buruma’s piece at The Guardian.

Dirty Doctor – Missy Pink’s Sex Advice

Missy Pink;

I’m having trouble sleeping, eating, and concentrating on work, the only thing I seem to have no trouble doing is thinking about a man I met the other day. First of all, let me say, I am married, 7 years ago I said, “I do,” and thought I would always abide by my vows, but, I’ve never had anyone turn my head like this guy. A month ago I slipped on some steps and hurt my ankle, a friend drove me to the doctor’s office, where the attending student doctor was the first to come into my room. He was gorgeous and my heart skipped a beat! Our eyes locked and I think he was feeling the same chemistry as I was. Let me say, I’ve never, ever given anyone a second glance before, always faithful, but, this man really rocked my world and I’m due to go back in a few days for a check-up to my sprained ankle, and I have to admit, I’m anxious and excited. I’m ashamed to say this, but when having sex with my husband, I fantasize I’m with the student doctor, and, I’m masturbating many times a day with the same fantasies. I feel like a horrible person, but, I can’t stop.

Dearest Friend;

Well, it sounds as if the medical attention for your ankle went straight to your head! On your return visit for a check-up, you may want to see if they can write you a prescription for the seven-year-itch you seem to be experiencing.

A lot of things will factor into a lightning bolt, eyes-locking, heart racing, moisture building moment shared between two people. Luckily, for the most part, many times it turns out to be just a coincidental, one time only type of occurrence, enough to set your mind awhirl as your panties hit the floor. There is something called endorphins, and when those kick in, they can have a very powerful impact, especially on your sexual desires. It could have been a certain expression the student doctor had when he walked into the room, his aftershave, the crisp, white, starched jacked he wore, boosting your appreciation for a man in uniform, a thousand things could have sparked those invisible little gremlins that reside within the brain, wreaking havoc with your happy home life.

Since you mentioned fantasizing about him when having sex with your husband, and also during multiple solo masturbation sessions, I’m assuming your attraction was completely physical, which, there’s nothing wrong with that, we all need that spark of something now and then to awaken dormant desires, but, since you’re wearing a ring on your left hand, it’s better to leave it only to your imagination.

If you are feeling horrible over the image of this man in your mind, think of how consumed you would be if you were to act upon it. Sometimes dreams are much better than reality, that’s why snooze buttons were installed on alarm clocks, to keep the dream alive!

Take your wild desires by the hand and lead them into your own bedroom, with your very own husband, do a little more foreplay a bit more hardcore action, and leave him feeling more than just drained after an orgasm. Don’t replace his face or body with anyone else’s, remember it was love that brought you together, and faithfulness will keep it that way. It never hurts to fantasize, it’s normal, healthy and exciting, so don’t beat yourself up over it, but do keep it where it belongs… in your mind, along with thoughts such as what to fix for dinner, and did you remember to mail in the mortgage payment.

When you go back for your check-up, put your best foot forward when having your ankle examined. Remember when he puts the stethoscope to your chest, the heart he hears, beats for your husband.