Flirts in Skirts

Skirts Up GirlsBack when I was attending Catholic school – yes, that unidentifiable guilt is still with me – my female fellow students were held to a dress code rule that didn’t directly impact us boys: skirt/dress length. The unnecessarily sadistic method teachers had of testing the length of a girl’s skirt or dress was to instruct them to kneel on the floor or, if during recess, on the cold, hard asphalt. If the hem of the garment touched the ground, the girl was fine, if not, detention. (Now there’s a killer idea for a pornsite!) The idea behind this rule being that any girl who wore a skirt short enough to allow anyone, be it teacher, student, school caretaker, secretary, or a boy from a visiting school, visual access to her upper thighs was a “bad girl” who wasn’t welcome in such a fine, upstanding educational institution. Fuck that, am I right? Wear ’em short, ladies! Give us a peek at anything you want to show off. Believe me, we’re eternally grateful for any additional inch of skin. Why do you think we follow you around shopping malls? Stair and escalators, ladies. Stairs and escalators.

Upskirt porn has seen its peaks and valleys of popularity, though it seems of late to have unfortunately avoided the attention of too many porn fans. Perhaps it has been the increased proliferation of celebrity upskirt photos snapped by paparazzo as our hot-legged stars crawl out of limos or prance around onstage in outfits your mother might admire on TV, but would throw up if she caught her daughter wearing. There are, however, some upskirt sites still going strong. One of these recently went under the Pink-O-Scope™: Skirts Up Girls. For the ful lowdown on what’s up at Skirts Up Girls, check out our full review here. (Hint: it rhymes with Stüssy… kinda.)

Your Mother Wouldn’t Like It

MrPinksPartly because she was raised in a strict Catholic household by prolifically procreating, but otherwise asexual parents, and partly because I don’t want my mother thinking her son sits at home all day with nothing but a tub of lotion and a crusty old handkerchief for company, I haven’t yet managed to tell my mother exactly what I do for a living. “I write reviews of hardcore pornographic websites,” doesn’t exactly seem like the kind of declaration you can make over a dinner of roast chicken and vegetables on a Sunday evening. Reluctant as I am to continue the charade – unlike some, I’d rather not lie to my mother on a regular basis – I just can’t seem to be able to find the right way to inform her of my current occupation.

During a recent phone call, Mom and I spoke about the weather, what music I’ve been listening to, my movie recommendations, my siblings, my father, the declining mental health of my grandmother, which holiday songs and jingles we found the most obnoxious… everything but work. As far as she knows I work on a computer for something involving the Internet, so when she subtly inquired as to how I earn my income by asking “And how’s work going?” my overly simplistic response of “Fine. You know, busy, busy, busy!” seemed adequate. I wanted to answer “Well, Mom, it’s really quite an interesting time of the year for the porn industry. The AVN Awards are about to take place and may determine the trends, rising stars, and powerhouse studios of 2012, changing the kind of material I’ll be writing about in both reviews and blogs. Asa Akira just did a double-anal scene and I wouldn’t be surprised if that kind of ultra-sensitive physical activity is on the cards for a large number of younger pornstars who now think they have to follow suit to even be considered for decent roles. If you’ll recall, 2008 to 2011 was largely focused on who’d be taking it in the ass, from whom, when and for which studio. I’m inclined to believe 2012 will be the start of a similar line of thought but, you know, twice as intense. Ha.”

Nope, instead I just told her it was fine. She might be aware of what happens in contemporary hardcore pornographic movies; she might not. She might want to know what I really do for work; she might not. She might understand that her beliefs about porn (and religion and economics and politics) don’t exactly mirror mine; but then again she might not.

Ah, mothers. Can’t live with ’em, can’t tell ’em about your work on the periphery of the porn industry.

Missy Pink’s Sex Advice

Missy Pinks at MrPinks.comFire up the marquee, there’s an announcement to be made for our loyal followers of Mr. Pinks! We’re proud to report a new feature is being added to your already trusted source of information, and that is, Missy Pink’s Sex Advice! Everyone carries questions that you don’t feel comfortable even sharing with your best friend over an afternoon cup of coffee, so we’re supplying a place to visit on a regular basis that will be your pornographic porthole to naughty knowledge.  Be it daily issues or nighttime dilemmas, Missy Pink’s Sex Advice is ready to dish out her perspective, coating it with wisdom and a sprinkle of humor, making for some enjoyable reading.

Like each aspect of Mr. Pink’s, it all works because of you, so we’re counting on participation from our devoted friends to make our girl tackle anything that’s been weighing heavily on your mind. We’re striving for this question corner of our site to be the “go to” place for you, to prop your feet up and read about the pillow talk type of problems going on in bedrooms far and wide, not to mention what might just be cooking in the neighbors kitchen! That’s right, we don’t judge, we don’t edit, and we certainly don’t blush, so send in your questions and see what Missy Pink’s Sex Advice can do for you!