I am so angry with my husband, I don’t even want to see him when he comes home from work today. I’ve been trying to ignore one particular fault of his for the last 8 years, but I’ve had my fill. He thinks he’s the sexiest man in town and his actions are driving away all of our friends. Last night we had a couple over for a cook-out, and while he’s flipping hamburgers and spinning hot dogs on the grill, he flexes his muscles, puffs out his chest and does nothing but talk about how he can satisfy a woman in every possible way. If that’s the case, why am I so miserable? He brags about how I must be the happiest woman in the world to go to bed with him every night, and then he’ll have females “reach up here and feel the thickness of my bicep!” We’re down to just a few close friends that do their best to ignore his boastful way, everyone else has been driven away, and when I say something to him, he replies with, “It must be something about you, because we both know, I’m perfect!” I need advice and quick, I’m ready to pack my bags and leave him with the person he seems to love the most.
One Seriously Fed Up Female
Dear Fed-Up;
I think we all, in the course of life, have crossed paths with something that resembles your husband, and, we usually wonder who could ever put up with them on a full time basis, and why. Modesty is a fine trait to have, but, everything falls under limitations and less is more when it comes to tooting one’s own horny.
From the way your letter read, I don’t get the feeling that you see his bragging as a means of “hitting on” other women, it’s more just his egotistical attitude that has you wanting to go into your bedroom, pick up the fluffiest pillow you have, place it over your face, and scream!
Even though it may not seem to be a possibility, many times, a person that exhibits this type of persona is often a very insecure personality, so, they over compensate, which is more than annoying to have to be subjected to. Does he ever show a vulnerable side with you, in or out of the bedroom? Since his body seems to be what he worships the most, maybe that is the part of his life he’s not totally comfortable with, there’s something he feels to be a flaw, so, he tries to direct everyone’s attention to another area, so it won’t be noticed.
You did mention being miserable, and, I’m wondering if that goes for the bedroom topic as well? He seems to be so full of himself, he’s overlooking you. He presents himself as being a gift that keeps on giving, and just allowing you to be in his presence should be enough. Since his rebuttal is what it is, when you try to talk to him in regards to driving away your friends and such, he’s definitely in some sort of state of denial, and there could be a very deep rooted cause for it. It seems to be highly magnified and maybe a bit more than what you would want to try to break through yourself.
If you truly are so disgusted you don’t even want to see him, it’s time something is done before a marriage is forced to end. It’s time you sit him down and instead of telling him exactly what bothers you the most, knowing he’ll reply with the fault being you, inform him that either single or combined marriage counseling is obtained or he leaves you no choice but to pack your bags and leave him with himself, and soon, he’ll even grow weary of it. There’s a falseness of some sort living behind his words, there are issues brewing deeply and it’s never too late to get help. Changing his attitude may very well make you the happiest woman in the world, but instead of flexing his muscles, he needs to do some character building.