Every year when July 4th rolls around, citizens and residents of the United States of America don their national colors, throw back a few too many Bud Lites, and proudly boast of their homeland’s global superiority. They also, if history is any indication, beat themselves senseless in a patriotic masturbatory fury. In the past Mr. Pink’s has brought you previews and reviews of July 4th-themed porno, but this year it seems studios are focusing not on star-and-stripe bikinis but on providing viewers with hefty discounts. Here’s a look at the hottest Independence Day porno bargains on offer this year.
Naughty America seems like the most logical place to start. The Virtual Reality leader and devoted chronicler of American taboos is offering would-be subscribers a blowout deal of one full year of Naughty America access for a meager $4.95-a-month. Spizoo is also jumping in on the July 4th bargain barrage, offering 50% off your first month of membership; a $14.95 payment gets you in the door for 30 days of wondrous glam-hardcore viewing. Deviance devotees Kink.com have slashed prices too, allowing sign-ups at $12.95-a-month or $100-a-year, both prices being good for the duration of your stay. Brazzers, the ZZ, this freaky fuckers, have also lowered their yearly price to just $89.99 or $7.50-a-month, another great deal for fans of this infamous porno party.
Seriously lowering the cost of vicarious carnal satisfaction, however, are Evil Angel, Burning Angel, Fame Digital, and Mile High Media, all of which are now offering a three-day trial membership for absolutely free. How’s that for fucking freedom, y’all?
From all of us at Mr. Pink’s, have a great holiday long weekend and, please, try not to seriously maim anyone with fireworks gone awry. Maybe it’d be better to stay inside and keep to yourself… if you know what I mean.