Updates with Angels

Evil Angel

Evil Angel and Elegant Angel might share A-list pornstar talent, assloads of AVN Awards and an enormous global audience, but there’s stylistic differences that clearly mark them as separate and unique entities both making invaluable, if quite different contributions to the adult industry. For example: Evil Angel’s DVD covers are draped in crimson and black with metal flourishes and titles like Evil Anal and Ass Hysteria while Elegant Angel opts for a sleek and far more sedate white-and-pink treatment for Curvy Girls, Cuties, Asian Bombshells and other titles. Just see the latest announcements from each company and their differences will be confirmed.

Ok, so maybe they’re more alike than previously suggested. Bonnie Rotten, having been crowned the AVN Female Performer of the Year at January’s ceremony, continues her thriving career by taking up the honored mantle previously held by Cytherea and Jada Fire. And, strangely enough, squirting isn’t something Ms. Rotten even knew she could both do and enjoy before she started in porn, as she explains in this here interview:

Aiden Starr joining the ranks of Evil Angel directors makes about as much sense as Bonnie Rotten being appointed Squirtwoman, i.e.: plenty! After Belladonna, Bobbi Starr, and Dana Vespoli before her, Ms. Starr is another acclaimed female performer moving to the director’s chair under the guidance of John “Buttman” Stagliano’s crew. And, like those women before her, she’s making her first venture a rather risque one. Pussy Whipped, out April 16, sees a cast including Bella Rossi, Sarah Shevon, and Phoenix Askani join Starr for everything from egg-laying to prolapsed assholes to tentacle sex, with nary a (real human) penis in sight!

Two of the most fierce and unforgettable women performers making bold new steps in their careers, the results of which seem disproportionately beneficial to us, and people still want to maintain that porn is dying? Nonsense. I never doubt that I’m in the right industry, but clearly it’s these women who I should be working for!

Elegant Angel

Steaks & BJs: Because You’re Worth It

Steak and Blowjob Day

After hundreds of years of commercially co-opted romance made us guys slaves to our ladies on Valentine’s Day, one frustrated and under-appreciated guy did something about it. Starting out as a small grass roots movement to reserve an annual celebration of all men do to keep their ladies happy but soon becoming an international phenomenon, Steak and BJ Day has come a long, long way and now sees women around the world return to the stove-top or grill then drop to their knees in appreciation of their fellas.

Brazzers is arguably the most macho porn network on the ‘net and, true to its irreverent style, there’s a celebration going on at Real Wife Stories today, Steak and BJ Day 2014, that involves steak (obviously), fellatio (thankfully) and Madison Ivy’s marvelous devotion to dick. Standing on the set of her Cookin’ with Madison Ivy show, the Brazzers contract star professes her fondness for “fat, juicy steak” and encourages viewers to thoroughly “beat their meat” while bending over a counter, giving the crew a glimpse of her ass.

Madison Ivy

Offering the browned porterhouse to her producer husband only to be reminded of his veganism (read: emasculation), Madison denies his request for the BJ, telling us “Vegetarians are such pussies. I’m a carnivore and I like cock.” Brick, who has been manning the camera and stifling an erection, is called to the floor and fills the void left by his herbivorous superior. They chow down on the meat before she does on his, tossing her tiny, tight body around for full carnal effect.

Madison Ivy blowjob

If your Steak and BJ Day isn’t going according to plan, thank your preferred deity for Brazzers and Madison Ivy. (Oh, and that vegan dude, the husband she denied a blowjob? He stood by and watched his wife get plugged by some dude named Brick. What a pussy! Don’t be that guy!)

Madison Ivy cumshot

#RIPVinePorn

Amateur (and often self-shot) pornography abounds on Twitter, Reddit, Instagram, Tumblr, and pretty much any other online community of like-minded horndogs, but one service has decided to nix the homemade erotica for more family friendly values. Unfortunately, that service is also the one that brought us such delectable digital pleasures as a video Daisy Summers calls “Boobs Blunts and Bubbles”, Jessie Andrews joining Aiden Starr for a two-blonde blowjob (kinda), and Alina Li getting very, very comfortable with beer-drining bro on a sofa.

Boobs Blunts and Bubbles

Sucking Dick with Aiden Starr

Alina Li and friend

That’s right, fellas, Vine recently announced that it would no longer permit users to “post content that is pornographic or sexually explicit – even if it is of yourself or marked as sensitive,” effectively banning both pornstars and amateur exhibitionists from sharing their naked forms. It’s not a complete disaster, though. As history has well proven, repression of sexual expression simply forces the erotically inclined to move underground and to find other services. Curiously, Vine’s owner, Twitter, permits porn in abundance, as does Instagram (even if it claims otherwise), while Reddit is flush with dozens of sexy NSFW subforums where enthusiasts share their accumulated images and exhibitionists share their homemade porn without signing away their identity to some skeezy producer. Then there’s Pornstagram, a service that is basically Instagram for adults only. Isn’t that the beauty of living in the Information Age, though? As soon as one service or product disappears, three arise in its place. The Internet: it’s the hydra of porn!

Lorelei Lee: Under the Hammer

Lorelei Lee

Fuck the Global Financial Crisis and your own dwindling savings account balance, those intrepid explorers of the furthest reaches of human sexuality, the San Francisco-based studio Kink.com, recently opened bidding on one of the company’s very own directors and performers, Lorelei Lee.

After a previous auction saw one fan pay $42,000 for an intimate private webcam session with Maitresse Madeline, the icy blonde Ms. Lee offers her services to the highest bidder and ensures, whatever his or her kinky preferences, satisfaction. Presented under the Kink Divine Bitches marquee, Lee says this auction aims to “expand the relationship between the fan and the star. They want to worship us, and we want them to worship.” Services available to the winning bidder – who’ll presumably pay much more than the current top bid of $24,200 – include lessons in servitude and submission or the chance to dominate, to completely control this particular Divine Bitch. The winner also receives a complimentary year of Kink.com access, signed photos of Ms. Lee, an HD copy of the private show and, most excitingly, the props used by Ms. Lee during their special time together.

Sure, unless you’re a future oil tycoon, criminal mastermind, or just really, really hard working, you won’t even consider bidding on some time with Lorelei Lee, but those of us that are should probably start seeing if our budgets can accommodate such a rash expenditure. (At least for me, an adult entertainment professional, it’ll be tax deductible!)

Lorelei Lee

Beatin’ on a Budget! with Naughty America

Naughty America

Home to such legendary sites as My Friend’s Hot Mom, Dirty Wives Club, Naughty Office, Housewife 1-on-1, and Latin Adultery, Naughty America has since 1998 been regarded by fans and critics alike as one of the leading US porn studios and websites. Now seeing recent star turns by relative newcomers like Kleio Valentien, Bonnie Rotten, Siri, and Valentina Nappi appearing alongside the busty MILFs that made NA’s name, and following the launch of a brand-new all-anal site (My Girl Loves Anal), the unveiling of new membership payment options (Bitcoin, gift cards), the increasing number of stunningly detailed 4K-resolution HD movies, and a spring sale, Naughty America is harder to resist than ever before.

THE MATH:
Naughty America’s 38 websites cost a measly 46c each if you take advantage of NA’s current spring membership sale. The collected works of Naughty America’s sites – totaling 3,454 scenes and roughly the same number of photo galleries – have a delightfully low cost-per-scene of only 50c. If you’re somewhat reluctant to throw down the discounted $17.76 for a full month’s membership, Naughty America also offers a three-day limited-access trial for $1.95 that might not give you access to everything, but makes for one fantastic preview.

The birds are out and chirping, the snow has started to melt, and falling icicle fatalities are on the decline, so why not celebrate spring’s arrival by staying indoors, closing the curtains, and emigrating to the real land of sexual opportunity: Naughty America.