The Return of John Holmes

John Holmes

The death of a great artist inevitably brings out vultures eager to release and rerelease any works by the now more-profitable deceased. Elliott Smith, Jeff Buckley, and Jimi Hendrix fans have all been “treated” to a methodical onslaught of lost recordings, outtakes, demos, and embarrassing studio missteps all in the name of maintaining copyright ownership, preserving the legend, and keeping them good ol’ greenbacks rolling in. A somewhat notable exception has been John Holmes, the man once dubbed “The Sultan of Smut,” but Hustler Founder and Chairman Larry Flynt is reviving Holmes’s filmography with the discovery of two never-before-released hardcore movies starring a young Holmes in what are being touted as his very first performances.

The two features, Balls in Action and The Doctor Is In, apparently constitute the first work of Holmes and were discovered by Hustler’s video archivists and researchers. Flynt called the films “hidden treasures” and “something really special,” declaring Hustler “very excited” to make them publicly available. Robert Smith, Hustler Video’s Director of Operations, said Flynt often purchases large archives of adult material to comb through and that this particular haul yielded a “jackpot!”

Remastered by Hustler Video and currently being prepped for a home video (DVD via Zero Tolerance) release in early 2016, Balls in Action and The Doctor Is In will also make it to Hustler TV and Hustler.com. Expect more information and previews from Mr. Pink’s as they come to light. Until then, check out the best of Holmes’ legendary work, including the Johnny Wadd series, at The Classic Porn.

Mr. Pink’s Weekly Report – November 11th, 2015

mrpinksIt’s getting chilly in certain parts of these United States lately and what better than another dose of Mr. Pink-approved pornography to keep you warm and toasty no matter the weather outside? This week we checked out two makers of high-grade HD porn and two sites showcasing women usually neglected by the mainstream. The latter, Karup’s Hometown Amateurs and Karup’s Older Women, got brand new reviews detailing their continued relevancy while My Very First Time’s anal debutants and Pure Mature’s scorching hot MILFs proved as excellent technically as it is erotically. Next week there’s more brand new and supremely sexy stuff on the way, so keep ’em peeled on Pink’s!

Ronda Rousey’s Slippery Sex Tips

Ronda Rousey

She may be one of the most Googled female athletes in recent memory, and world champion in her chosen sport, a Hollywood player with mainstream movie cameos, and now the author of a sex and dating advice column for men’s mag Maxim, but Ronda Rousey probably shouldn’t be dispensing sex tips or criticizing others practices until she’s learned a few things about the variability of human sexual response.

Telling Maxim reader “Jack, 36, Los Angeles” that using lubricant is a sign of sexual inadequacy, impatience, and disregard for a woman’s arousal is just plain irresponsible. Italicizing her response because she’s so damn sure it’s correct, Rousey says “You should never need lube in your life. If you need lube, then you’re being lazy.” So every post-menopausal woman who suffers from vaginal dryness has a lazy lover? Those couples dealing with sexual anxiety or a disconnected physical response or under the haze of a nice strain of cannabis sativa might also find the lower regions a little less moist than your average folks.

Though the idea that any guy reaching for a tube to lube his partner isn’t taking his time has an iota of validity, there’s always those guys and couples who prefer longer bouts of intercourse, something lube no doubt helps extend without rawness and irritation ruining an epic coital congress. And then, Ms. Rousey, there’s the marvelous world of anal intercourse, something that would hardly be comfortable enough to pursue without the aid of additional lubrication.

Dudes, Maxim readers, sexually active humans… Don’t listen to Ronda. Load up on lube and see how smooth your sex life can be. And, if you must listen to Ronda, at least listen to Kleio Valentien as Ronda ArouseMe in Burning Angel’s hit porn parody. Trust me, it lasts longer than most Rousey bouts and is very wet indeed.

Hentai Springs to Life with Anime Eyes

Puuko hentai

Hentai fans, grab your wallets! No, it’s not another tentacle bangin’ bonanza, it’s a new range of contact lenses that can have the wearer looking far more kawaii than anyone else on the convention floor. Produced by Anime Contacts, the three distinct designs of contact lens now available aim to transform boring old human peepers into sparkling windows into the most charming of souls. Or, if you’re a deviant – and since you’re a Mr. Pink’s reader, I assume you are – they’ll transform any near-perfect ‘couples cosplay’ adventure into a much more convincingly surreal experience.

Having over the years reviewed more than a few hentai websites, JAV websites, and bizarre amalgamations of the two, this reviewer can see great porno potential for such a cartoonish accessory. Imagine how cool your filtered iPhone pics of your sweet little Reki-jo on her kimono-covered knees with your dick in her mouth! Adding that extra dose of anime styling to professional porn would prove even more popular, I’ve no doubt. Take something like Kink’s fairly recent Hardcore Gangbang of Marica Hase in which the ultra-flexible Japanese babe donned a bright blue wig and form-fitting superhero costume to play a convention-bound girl with magic erection-locating powers. Throw in some POV shots with Marica staring up at the camera, first bright-eyed and eager, later teary and worn (as is Kink’s M.O.) and you’d have anime-loving porno fans (like Marica herself) all in a tizzy.

Priced affordably at 3,300 yen (or $27 USD) per pair, the three lens styles are called Ururu ( meaning teary-eyed), Kirakira (twinkle/sparkle), and Kiratto (bright) and are now available direct from Anime Contacts in Japan. US distribution hasn’t yet materialized but Mr. Pink’s will surely let you know when they become locally available.