K-Pop-Porn

If the recent-ish launch of international pop music channels MTV Iggy and MNet America are to be believed, the USA is about to be inundated by a world of music most Americans have never even considered. From reggaeton to baile funk, from C-Pop to J-Pop to K-pop, there are dozens of artists with the talent, determination, and financial backing to blow the minds of America’s Internet generation. One group already starting their US invasion is the nine-member South Korean girl group Girl’s Generation. Having just released their first worldwide single, The Boys, the video to which garnered over 4 million YouTube views on its day of release, with an American album release coming in November through Interscope Records, and with a showcase performance at Madison Square Garden this Sunday in New York City, Girls’ Generation are poised to bring about a global group revival in popular music. Their tunes are great and Taeyon, Hyoyeon, Yuri, Yoona, Tiffany, Sooyoung, Seohyun, Jessica, and Sunny has distinct personalities and styles but blend together as a perfect ensemble, but what’s the real reason behind their smash worldwide success? For the answer, as always, we turn to porn.

Lady Gaga, Britney Spears, and Katy Perry have all been lampooned in US porn productions, but they’re just solo performers. Imagine how appealing a pornographic movie based on a nine-member all-girl singing and dancing group would be! Well, folks, it exists. Beautiful Legs Legend, a JAV (Japan Adult Video) release that copies Girls’ Generation’s outfits, dance moves, and music, but with an illicit twist, has proven that, along with the real ninesome’s truckload of miniskirt and short-short-accented stage outfits, long legs can sell anything.  Unfortunately, the JAV in question consists largely of five, not nine uncoordinated young women lazily dancing around sans panties. Yeah, there’s a foot fetish bukkake scene thrown in at the end, but that’s pretty dull, too. I suppose that’s what you get when Japan, whose pop music (J-Pop) has became stale and uninspired over recent years after decades of Asian dominance, tries to take on the rapidly expanding and wildly successful eighteen-legged Korean juggernaut that is Girls’ Generation. Fighting!

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