Mr. Marcus’s 50 Baddest Babes

Mr. MarcusMr. Marcus is a man who knows women, if not mentally or emotional, then definitely carnally. He has, after all, slipped his impressive penis into hundreds upon hundreds of women, both professionally and privately. As one of porn’s reigning African American studs, Marcus’s reputation (with both men and women) for being a top-notch cocksman is as glowing as can be. Scratch that, it’s just about to get even better.

In a feature published by XXL Mag, Marcus gives readers a breakdown of what he finds attractive in a woman by way of a list of who he considers to be the “50 Baddest Chicks” in the world. Starting off at the bottom and working my way to the #1 spot, I came upon a few notable inclusions, women that are either Mr. Pink’s favorites, surprising choices, or straight-up evidence of Marcus’s peculiar taste.

#48: Japanese former journalist, current Pepsi spokesmodel, Emi Moriyama.

#45: Ozone Magazine publisher Julia Beverly. Says Marcus, “She’s got that runner’s body that I like with sisters, but she’s got it for a white girl.”

#38: Freida Pinto, who “represents for Indian women.”

#37: Monica! Yes, that Monica, “The Boy Is Mine” Monica. Dude, Monica!

#29: Marcus says Tupac would’ve loved Jada Fire. Shit, who wouldn’t except my mother?

#19: Rihanna, who Marcus says he included for her cell phone pics. (Presumably the naked ones.)

#7: Asa Akira, whose “sexuality knows no boundaries,”, which is pretty damn obvious if you’ve seen Insatiable 2.

#4: Nyomi Bannx. One of Mr. Pink’s favorite pornstars, black or white, Marcus says Nyomi is the natural successor to…

#3: Former pornstar, now rapper, painter, and author, trailblazer, Heather Hunter.

and finally…

#1: Janet motherfuckin’ Jackson! Marcus says Janet “Encompasses all around sexuality,” calling her “a woman with longevity” who “plays really hard to get [and] seems hard to please, which I like.”

Now there’s a man with intriguing but supremely respectable taste.

Porn Industry Faces Mandatory Condom Act

Mr. Pink's CondomIn the upcoming June elections, Los Angelenos will be asked to vote on whether or not to pass a new measure that would force porn producers to agree to wear condoms in all adult shoots in the Los Angeles area. Failing to do so would give governing body FilmLA cause to deny shooting permits and could potentially cripple the now thriving adult entertainment industry. Initiated by For Adult Industry Responsibility (FAIR), a front group for AIDS Healthcare Foundation (AHF), the measure has obtained almost double the 35,000 signatures required to place a measure on the ballot. The superficial elements of the condom issue aside, the details of the proposed ordinance, called “City of Los Angeles Safer Sex in The Adult Industry Act,” are largely unknown to the public. You, dude, you’re the public! The porn watching public, no less, so don’t you think you should know what’s has the potential to go down come June 2012? Here’s a breakdown of the two main issues:

– All adult producers would be required to have performers agree to wear condoms and to”maintain engineering and work practice controls…sufficient to protect employees from exposure to blood and other potentially infectious materials,” in order to receive a FilmLA shooting permit for LA City productions.

– FilmLA would be required to ask a higher fee of adult productions companies in order to cover the costs of “periodic inspections,” and considering how frequently and widely porn is shot in LA, that’s a ton of money leaving the hands of adult producers.

Opponents of the proposed ordinance are saying it infringes on the constitutional right to freedom of speech and expression – the right of consenting adults to fuck on camera sans rubbers – and have decried it as imposing healthcare responsibilities and the policing thereof on what is essentially an administrative department. Me, well, I don’t see folks fucking any way but bareback in my fantasies, so why would I accept condoms in porn? Of course, in real life everyone should be practicing safe sex, but porn ain’t real life, is it?

Win a Date with Lisa Ann!

Lisa Ann FleshlightSome dude serving in the US Marine Corps requested a date with Friends With Benefits star, Mila Kunis, and got it. Soon after a woman solider serving alongside him asked out Kunis’s co-star, Justin Timberlake, who gladly donned a tux and escorted his fan to the Instructor Battalion Marine Corps Ball. You, all the you want is a date with a pornstar. Which pornstar doesn’t really matter, but, hey, Lisa Ann’s fucking stunning so why not her? Well, now the leading manufacturer of sexual aids for men, Fleshlight offers you a chance to escort the one and only Ms. Lisa Ann herself to the 2012 AVN Awards in Las Vegas. All you’ve gotta do is head on over to Fleshlight’s webstore and buy one of Lisa’s signature Fleshlights and you could be flown to Vegas to accompany everyone’s favorite über MILF to the AVN Awards, a gala event every porn fan dreams of attending.

And, hey, if you don’t win, you’ll still have your fantasies and a brand new Barracuda or Forbidden Fleshlight molded with the incomparable Lisa Ann’s vagina or asshole, and that, dear reader, ain’t nothing to sneeze at.

Peeping Pt. 2: Peepers Beware

Whether or not you’re aware of it, the likelihood that a complete stranger has has visual access to the lower undergarment your girlfriend, sister, friend, mother, or even daughter is very high. If these females wear skirts, it is even higher. If they have worn a skirt while visiting New York’s Union Square, it’s almost a certainty. Peepers are on a panty-prowl all over the world, yes, but thanks to the tireless efforts of Normal Bob Smith, the self-appointed sentinel of Union Square, these perverted men face embarrassment, exposure, and ridicule. On his Union Square-focused website, Normal Bob Smith’s Amazing Strangers, our hero has, as previously reported by Mr. Pink’s, documented the activities and methodologies of these Peepers in an effort to enlighten and empower skirt-wearing women of New York and, indeed, of the entire world. The most illustrative of Smith’s documents is a series of video works entitled “Methods of a Peeper.” With six installments already online (and hopefully more to come), Smith goes into incredible detail narrating this own footage of Peepers in action. After exposing the “Tandem Style Passenger Window”, “Portrait”, and “Front Row” Peeping methods, Smith and his camera have unearthed actual footage of the most dangerous of all Peeping methods, Picture Peeping.

Armed with an everyday digital camera, the Picture Peeper doesn’t just hope to catch himself a glimpse of a stranger’s panties, he hopes to document it for later viewing and perhaps even distribution. We’ve all seen websites purporting to host galleries and movies of surreptitiously snapped upskirt or down-blouse images, but I, for one, usually assume they were taken with the permission and cooperation of the subject. Methods of a Peeper 6: Picture Peeping now has me convinced otherwise. With his camera trained on a pot-bellied aging Peeper, Smith points out various peeping techniques – dangling a camera from the wrist, pretending to calculate numbers while holding said camera, holding the camera low and steady while taking long, extended videos et. al. – all of which allow the Peeper to store his images for a lonely Saturday evening or for sharing with friends. With the unwelcome online distribution of intimate photos as hot a topic as ever, the lessons to be gleaned from Smith’s public service videos are so vital they perhaps should be shown in schools, YWCAs, and self-defense classes around the country.

Like Spider-Man and Travis Bickle before him, though, Normal Bob Smith and his selfless attempts to preserve the sanctity of his beloved New York will likely go unnoticed, misunderstood, and under-appreciated. Mr. Pink, for one, isn’t afraid to applaud his heroic efforts, efforts that have brought him face-to-face with the sleaziest men of The Big Apple, resulted in plenty of hate mail, and no doubt placed his own safety in great jeopardy.

Normal Bob Smith, you are a true patriot and for you valiant efforts to protect the sanctity of what lies between the legs of the women of New York, Mr. Pink salutes you, sir.