Beatin’ on a Budget! with Exxxtasy

A few years ago, a friend of a friend was over at my place and noticed a stack of about ten DVD-R spindles sitting on top of a bookshelf. When I told him they contained digital copies of old and obscure Japanese, Korean, and Polish cinema titles, he couldn’t believe his ears. It wasn’t my questionable copyright infringement that disturbed him, it was the idea that I still kept content stored on physical discs. “Media should be streamed,” he told me, “DVDs just take up landfill space, degrade in quality over time, and are prone to damage.” I defended my burning habit: “But you can’t loan a stream to a friend or throw it into the trash if it’s a shitty movie.” Still, he maintained that streaming was the way to go, a position clearly held by the subject of this week’s Beating on a Budget, the streaming only Exxxtasy.

exxxtasy

Now, don’t get me wrong. If you’re a particular kind of online porn viewer, the kind that keeps an archive of, say, Belladonna’s roughest gangbangs or the complete online works of Alina Li you won’t have much use for Exxxtasy, where downloading is prohibited. Those of you down with HD streams, on the other hand, might not have seen a site this appealing for a long, long time. Exxxtasy has only just begun its assault on your bandwidth, but it’s already a large site hosting tons of high-quality mainstream porn releases that, though not exclusive, are great to see pulled together in one place. Even though Exxxtasy was already dirt cheap to access, the site is celebrating its growth with a discount that should have all you porn-streamers clamoring to think of a totes sweet username. Originally $9.99-a-month, Exxxtasy, home to titles by Elegant Angel, Harmony Films, Pure Play Media, and Killergram, among others, can now be enjoyed for a ridiculously low $4.99 (valid for your first month’s access).

Although it’s by no means a perfect site, Exxxtasy overcomes its detriments (poor navigation tools, no downloading, no photos, no Roku channel… yet) and, quite simply, makes you an offer you can’t refuse: who can pass up 1,500 killer porno scenes starring A-listers galore for a measly $4.99? Hell, I was even granted complimentary access for review purposes and I still bought one month inside Exxxtasy. And here’s why…

THE MATH:
Exxxtasy currently holds a pretty dang substantial 1,547 scenes in its archives and charges $4.99 for one month’s access. This price point means that each individual scene hits a cost of only .3¢ – that’s one-third of a single cent! What more savings does a dirt-poor porn fan need?

Bargains like Exxxtasy don’t come along too often and especially not those granting you access to a hefty award-winning porn archive starring every pornstar worth a damn over the last decade, so (personal opinion alert) I’d pounce on this one if I were you.

The Sextape Situation: Part 1

A few years ago it seemed every female celebrity with any amount of drooling, ogling fans was the rumored subject of a homemade sextape, a pornographic movie shot by the participants who, aside from their noted celebrity, are otherwise everyday folks, not professional adult performers. You and your girlfriend shot some shaky iPhone footage that time on the commuter rail, right? Boom – that’s a sextape (although probably not a very good one). Stick a celebrity in an explicitly sexual situation and you’re looking at guaranteed millions in sales! Just ask Pam Anderson and Tommy Lee (or Brett Michaels) or Paris Hilton or Kim Kardashian. Their sex tapes launched endless imitators but also landed them (or their jilted ex-lovers) hefty distribution contracts and the resulting profits. Then came Farrah Abraham…

Farrah Abraham Backdoor Teen Mom

The MTV Teen Mom hired James Deen to join her in shooting an allegedly authentic sextape that was soon revealed to be as orchestrated and emotionless and most celebrity ventures. Cue the backlash. Once one of America’s most ridiculed young women made a blatant attempt to cash in on her “private” sex life, sextapes seemed to become passe almost overnight. Abraham’s second sextape, 2014’s Farrah 2: Backdoor and More, was also beaten out at the recent 32nd AVN Awards by, of all people, the queen of MTV has-beens, Tila Tequila. While it’s clear both women produced their “amateur” sextapes for commercial release, not to privately record intimate moments, Abraham’s continued lies about the production, generally condescending and dismissive attitude towards the adult entertainment community, and the fact that Tequila not only included some backdoor action, but also its stars ejaculatory prowess. Undeniably inching closer and closer to actual pornography in the conventional sense, sextapes seem all but dead as a commercial adult, more so over at Vivid.

Then along came GirlsWay and the so-called Sextape Lesbians with another approach, one we’ll examine in full next week.

Visit GirlsWayGirlsWay review

The Interview Heads to Hustler

the interview

Now that Sony Pictures has cancelled all release plans for the controversial Seth Rogen, James Franco comedy The Interview, prospective fans are wondering if the film will find another life after the nightmare of its proposed theatrical release. North Korean supreme leader, King Jong Un has denied his government had connection to an invasive hack that brought Sony Pictures to its digital knees, a connection strongly suggested by media pundits. Americans are rightfully concerned that Sony’s bowing to the wishes of a cyber-terrorist group, no matter how dubious their origins, sets a precedent for erasing our hard-won freedom to laugh at whatever the fuck we want. And that, dear reader, is something Larry Flynt of Hustler Magazine holds very, very dear.

Telling the Hollywood Reporter that he’d “spent a lifetime fighting for the First Amendment,” and declaring that “no foreign dictator is going to take away [his] right to free speech,” Flynt announced This Ain’t The Interview XXX, his company’s parody version of the doomed political comedy. “If Kim Jong Un and his henchmen were upset before, wait till they see the movie we’re going to make.”

And, whaddya know, it appears President Obama might be right on Flynt’s side this time: “We cannot have a society in which some dictators someplace can start imposing censorship here in the United States because if somebody is able to intimidate us out of releasing a satirical movie, imagine what they start doing once they see a documentary that they don’t like or news reports that they don’t like. That’s not who we are. That’s not what America is about.”

No, he’s right. America’s about tits. Lots and lots of tits. (And maybe some heavy duty ass, too!)