Brazzers | Mr. Pink's Blog

Porn for Saint Paddy

Now that we’ve all overcome our post-St. Patrick’s Day hangovers, how about a quick glance back in time to see what we all missed while downing pints of green beer and Guinness at our local taverns?

Brazzers, which holds a very impressive 94% rating from yours truly, presented its members with a scene starring Hailey Young, Ramon Nomar, and the most enviable little person this side of Warwick Davis. In the scene, Hailey, a nurse at O’Sullivan’s Mental Hospital for the Insane, happens upon a feisty lil’ leprechaun in the ER waiting room – naturally, he’s drunk – she reluctantly gets to work on helping him feel better. When things turn sexual, though, Hailey decides to let her fantasies take over by imagining the little Irish fella as handsome security guard Ramon, who gives her a right good plugging in every one of her saintly holes. Ah, nice one, Hailey!

Although definitely a red-white-and-blue pornsite from busty top to jam-packed bottom, Naughty America nonetheless got its members into the Irish festivities with a brand new scene starring Samantha Saint and the guy every woman in porn seems to love fucking, Johnny Sinns. Presented on Naughty America’s My Friend’s Hot Girl website, this scene decks the stunning Samantha out in a tartan skirt and green shirt, bra, panties, and even a green mini top-hat. She gets pretty annoyed with her boyfriend when he buggers off for a basketball game and decides to vent her frustration by fucking his friend Johnny, who has come calling in hopes of enjoying some drunken debauchery with the lads. The perfect way to celebrate St. Paddy’s day!

Also… nothing. Well, shit, folks. Of all the major adult sites, these two seemed to be the only ones looking out for their Irish members. Unless it’s too early to start drinking again, let’s raise our glasses to two of the best damn porn networks on the net, Brazzers and Naughty America. May they be in heaven a good thirty minutes before the devil even knows they’re dead. Sláinte!

Eva Angelina Bounces Back

Pornstars stop performing for any number of reasons. Linda Lovelace panicked, “got out” and saved her sanity; Jenna Haze wanted to focus on directing and fucking her beau, the lead singer of Dillinger Escape Plan; Sasha Grey had to prove herself an artiste, and Hayley Paige just plain died. Eva Angelina, though, her departure from the sexually-explicit screen was a little less worrisome.

Having progressed from flat-chested newcomer in a Shane’s World college-themed blowjob scene to amply-chested, tattooed goddess of hardcore, lascivious, powerful throat, pussy, and anal penetrations, often in the most lurid combinations, on sites such as Brazzers and ZTOD, it seemed like Eva Angelina was poised before her greatest success. She got that success (and one hell of an award) but it didn’t come from AVN or XBIZ or XRCO, it came from her womb.

After welcoming her daughter Silvi Mountain with then-husband and fellow pornstar Danny Mountain in 2008, Eva seemed to disappear from the industry for a number of years. Although rumors about a hastily made decision to quite porn for the suburban life weren’t exactly running rampant, nobody really knew whether or not Eva was planning a comeback. Then, almost out of nowhere, a few scenes started to filter through the networks and she reappeared.

Brazzers was the one of the first sites to showcase the post-baby-body Eva Angelina, with Bang Bros and Naughty America soon to follow, and what a sight it was. Even more decked-out and spruced-up than before, the reinvigorated AVN-winner had shaved the sides of her head, added a few tattoos, and launched herself back into porn, surprising many fans with her noticeably exuberant attitude lending itself perfectly to assfucking and double-penetration scenes with the likes of James Deen and Mick Blue. It had been a while since Eva threw herself headlong into a cockfest, but she proved to be in exemplary shape nonetheless.

Over at Bang Bros, Eva was added last week to the list of pornstar babes who’ve lent their bodies to one of the Bros’ newest sites, Pornstar Spa, and what a welcome return to BB HQ it was! Eva’s stunningly curvaceous body is showcased to perfection by the HD cameras as what is supposed to be a relaxing deep tissue massage turns into sex so hardcore it tests her endurance, flexibility,stamina, kegel power, and resilience as some lucky bastard (and his big purple dildo) gives the new mother a complete working over. In her Naughty America and Tonight’s Girlfriend scenes, Eva showed only a hint of the effect pregnancy has on the female body – stretch-marks being visible for, oh, a few seconds here and there. While this physical “flaw” is bound to turn off some compulsive masturbators, those eager to celebrate the return of one of contemporary porn’s greatest success stories will likely be even more turned on by Ms. Angelina than ever before, stretch-marks and all.

Eva, it’s great to have you back!

Gettin’ Sexy at the Spa

Massage porn has been blowing up the cyberwaves of late and it seems like any adult network worth its bandwidth is hastily cobbling together some kind of massage-related hardcore site to keep up with customer demands. Reality Kings has Happy Tugs, an Asian themed massage site; Porn Pros has Massage Creep; Brazzers hosts Dirty Masseur; WTF Pass has HD Massage Porn; and Teen Mega World has Tricky Masseur. Merely scraping the surface and keeping ourselves limited to networks only, no standalone sites, we’ve already gathered all the evidence needed to confirm that massage porn is set to follow parodies just as ska and so-cal punk followed grunge and alterna-rock. The best massage porn site of all, however, is the one with the strongest roster of models laying down and letting some lucky and manually dexterous “masseuse” run his filthy mitts all over their incredible bodies. That site, dear readers, is Pornstar Spa.

Under the watchful eye of the infamous Bang Bros, Pornstar Spa has grown from a seedling of an idea of a concept to one of the most thrilling sites on the entire Bang Bros network – and, man, is that saying something! The latest addition to the Pornstar Spa roster, which already includes more than two dozen incredible pornstar babes, is French/Vietnamese legend of the adult entertainment industry, frequent sparring partner of Manuel Ferrara and Rocco Siffredi, and multiple AVN Award winner, Katsuni. One quick gander at the previews of Katsuni’s Pornstar Spa scene and you’ll see why this site is so damn hard to turn away from: her luscious physique is captured in evocative low camera angles, making it feel like she’s right there in front of you. Lathered with oils and laying on a physiotherapy table, Katsuni’s body has rarely looked better than it does here, and that’s even before anything profoundly sexual occurs. You can imagine how thrilling it gets once she realizes this handyman is here to take care not just of her muscular tension, but her sexual tension, too.

So, you’re not a Katsuni fan? As difficult as that is for this writer to comprehend, we must respect all tastes. Just try and avoid finding an incredibly well-built babe who you wouldn’t turn to murder just to get your hands on for a few measly seconds within this list of Pornstar Spa performers: Vicki Chase, Lisa Ann, Amy Reid, Brynn Tyler, Diamond Kitty, Capri Cavalli, Jennifer Dark, Nicole Aniston, Phoenix Marie, Rachel Starr, Madison Ivy, Kelly Divine, Samantha Saint, Nikki Sexx, Mason Moore, Sophie Dee, Lylith Lavey, Katie Kox, Francesca Le, Vanilla DeVille, Abbey Brooks, Venice, Jayden Jaymes, Richelle Ryan, Sienna West, Tiffany D. Gore, and the incomparable (even after such a disappointing boob-job) Rebeca Linares.

Well, readers, did you ever see a more stellar lineup of physiques in one place in the history of adult entertainment? Yeah, thought not.

Brazzers Jumps Into Action

While it’s always a treat to go back and take another look at a site or network that had previous made a profoundly positive impression on yours truly, it’s even better when the site or network in question has made a huge leap in production quality, audio-visual quality, design, or usability. In the case of the Brazzers network, the first three couldn’t really have been much improved upon, but with the addition of a feature called Jump to Action, Brazzers now allows its stream-friendly viewers to head straight to the part of a scene that most appeals to their unique pornographic predilections.

Brazzers’ Jump to Action menu sits below all newly added scenes and shows, in the case of London Keyes’ recent ‘Invading Your Priv-Assy’ scene for Big Butts Like it Big, every act the delightful Asian-American pornstar performed with Mick Blue. From initial Blowjob to Spanking and a hot Side Fuck all the way to the Gaping brought on by Mick’s thick cock. Hovering your cursor over one of these markers shows a preview thumbnail of that moment in the video and, of course, when you click a marker you’re shot straight to that part of the scene. Nice development, huh?

So, if you’ve been putting off another month inside the Brazzers world because you love how Monique Alexander fucks but hate the way she blows, or you’re of otherwise perfect Charley Chase cocksucking scenes turning into blandly vanilla sex, or even if you just want to beat your meat fast and furiously to a clip of your favorite girl taking a load in the mouth over and over and over again, Jump to Action has you covered.