Halloween Porn Round-up, Pt. 1!

Brazzers SLUDSEvery year when October comes to a close, the online porn world sees an inordinate number of fanged, red-eyed, blood-sucking women launch themselves on unsuspecting men and, depending on where you look, on each other. Halloween, All Hallow’s Eve, Hop-tu-Naa, Qingming, Dia de los Muertos, Samhain… Whatever you’re celebrating come the close of October and the advent of November, you can bet there’s a porn scene hitting the cyberwaves to celebrate these holidays. Predominantly focusing on All Hallow’s Eve and its closest variants, American porn sites always make a concerted effort to ensure their fans remember their annual dose of Halloween-themed smut. This year is no different to previous Halloween holidays in the porn world – although the ever-increasing popularity of Twitter and Instagram are sure to give us glimpses of stunningly sexy pornstar costumes – and a number of sites have already launched their celebrations.

Over at Kelly and Ryan Madison’s Teen Fidelity, 18-year-old cutie Staci Silverstone comes up against one legendary movie villain of more recent times, Freddy Krueger himself, in a scene entitled Nightmare on Teen Street. Let’s hope she manages to avoid damage to her killer young body!

Wicked Pictures is also planning a live event, its twelfth, which will feature Phoenix Marie, Rachel Roxxx, and Alexis Monroe. Although details are still unavailable, it is being billed as a Halloween Special and since it’s due to air on October 30th (4pm EST), you can be sure the aptly named Wicked won’t disappoint. (Unfortunately, you’ll just have to keep an eye on Wicked’s website for further details.)

Brazzers site, Doctor Adventures, already has its Halloween celebration online. Called S.L.U.D.S. (Subhuman Lesbian Underground Dwellers), the scene sees mutant sluts Rachel Roxxx and Chanel Preston ensnare and devour soliders Will Powers and Bill Bailey in a Nevada desert in a possible dystopian future.

Mommy Got Boobs, another Brazzers site, is also joining the festivities with Hellvira: Mistress of the Fuck. Modeled after Cassandra Peterson’s buxom goth creation, Hellvira (Joslyn James) dazzles the hicks of her old hometown. Toni Ribas and Will Powers might be conservative dudes, but once face-to-face with Hellvira’s ample rack, well, they lose all self-restraint – as anyone would! There’s sure to be more Halloween smut on the way, so keep your beady eye trained on Mr. Pink’s to get all the gory details as they develop.

In Celebration of Asses

Today, dear reader, is National Ass Day and although I’ve no idea where this unofficial day of celebratory derriere worship originated, it was hash-tagged on Twitter (#NationalAssDay) and is therefore legitimate. If you follow Mr. Pink’s on Twitter, you would’ve seen me posting and retweeting some incredible backsides throughout the day, but if you don’t and didn’t here’s something tasty in praise of asses: the greatest rear-ends in porn!

 

Jynx Maze

Jynx Maze

 

Jessie Rogers

Jessie Rogers

 

Alexis Texas

Alexis Texas

 

Rachel Starr

Rachel Starr

 

Rebeca Linares

Rebeca Linares

Feel I’ve neglected some deliciously endowed women and their perfectly-proportioned rumps? Lemme know and join in the celebrations!

Seth MacFarlane: Too Busy for Porn

Seth MacFarlane, cartoonist, voice actor, movie director, and Michael Bublé-wannabe, is entering a new phase of his career with a just-announced hosting gig at the 85th annual Academy Awards this coming February. So in-demand is the Family Guy and Ted creator that he’s had to turn down other hosting gigs because he’s too busy. No, not another Comedy Central roast (he’s already done two), but the most prestigious awards ceremony in the nation, the AVNs.

Having offered MacFarlane a gig manning the mic at the upcoming 2013 ceremony, AVN was no doubt disappointed to find the crown prince of televised vulgarity was just too damn busy to present the not-entirely-unphallic glass trophies to porn’s best and bangingest come January next year. As the host of what will be the 30th anniversary of the AVN Awards, MacFarlane could’ve had his choice of porno pussy, but since he just signed a $100 million deal with Fox, I doubt he’s all that hard up for sexual favors.

A Drink with Kink

Kink.comPeter Acworth might be best known as the man who brought human sexuality’s darkest desires to a hundred-year-old castle in the middle of San Francisco’s Mission district with Kink dot com, but he’s really just a local bar owner at heart. Well, he is now that The Armory Club has opened in the same building that houses Sex & Submission and Bound Gang Bangs, among other now infamous Kink sites.

Calling itself “a social escape from the normalcy of everyday life,” The Armory Club offers creative, handcrafted cocktails, award-winning locally brewed beer, and “an exciting wine list” all in a ballroom modeled on Kink’s legendary Upper Floor. With pressed tin ceilings, a lit onyx bar, and cast-iron fireplace, the club is a natural progression for Acworth, whose personal touch has made Kink one of the most consistently engaging American porn studios of recent years. “For me, the Armory Club is just an extension of the Kink lifestyle,” Acworth told AVN. “We may produce fetish material, but we’re also a member of the community… We’re as much an ethos as we are a company.”

Having officially opened its doors on September 18th, The Armory Club, while housed in the profoundly imposing Armory castle, welcomes all patrons 21 and over and promises that while there’s nothing inherently sexual about the club, don’t be surprised if you waltz in to find the likes of Bobbi Starr, Lorelai Lee, or James Deen knocking back a Whistle Pig rye after a hard day in the torture chamber.