Mr. Pink’s Weekly Report – August 13th, 2015

mrpinksMr. Pink here once again with another slate of brand new porn reviews to keep your fapping on a worthwhile path! This week at Mr. Pink’s we peeled open, pried into, and gave a full assessment of Japanese adult animation site Hentai XXX, French-Canadian hardcore network Pegas Productions, Tainster’s contribution to drunken nightclub orgy porn dubbed Party Hardcore, and Brutal Castings, an audition-scenario venture from Fetish Network that’s a little undercooked but showing tons of promise. On the blog I previewed Joanna Angel’s latest pop-culture parody starring the fit ‘n’ fantastic Kleio Valentien, as well as celebrating the incomparable dick-sucking skills of Dana DeArmond. So sit down, grab a slice, and shoot the shit about your favorite pornstars with Mr. Pink!

Joanna & BA Enter the MMA Parody Fray

ronda arouseme

Burning Angel’s head honcho, Joanna Angel, is known not only for her hardcore performances and heavily modified physique, but also for her deft handling of pop-culture properties many other pornographers would simply dismiss as too unsexy or unfilmable to bother trying to turn into a sexy onscreen romp. After tackling the Grinch, The Addams Family, The Jason Ellis Show, The ALS Ice Bucket Challenge, Z-grade alien movies, and Evil Dead, it’s clear Ms. Angel and co. can turn any subject into hilarious and incredibly sexy alt.porn. It was only a matter of time, then, before the infamous director lent her hand to one of America’s favorite (and most brutal) pastimes: mixed martial arts or MMA, specifically the remarkable achievements of undefeated UFC Women’s Bantamweight Champion of the world, ‘Rowdy’ Ronda Rousey.

Casting fan-favorite mainstream crossover sensation Kleio Valentien as the 28-year-old Olympic medal winner and current world number one, Angel found a fighting fit champ all her own who could easily square up against any other woman in the business. For the flick she’s calling Ronda ArouseMe, Angel also cast Arabelle Raphael, Derrick Pierce, Moe “The Monster” Johnson, and Sammie Sixx in the crucial role of Rousey’s early rival “Miesha Taint” (as in Tate). And word, it seems, has been getting around. Not only has Angel’s upcoming parody been previewed in mainstream press publications NY Daily News, Toronto Sun, Complex, AskMen, and Daily Dot, but Ms. Angel was interviewed personally by TMZ Sports about the production’s origins and the fight-inspired moves learned by the cast in training.

Later speaking to AVN, Angel said she was overwhelmed by the attention. “It’s been so exciting. I think all of Ronda’s fans—and all of Kleio’s fans—will love this movie. I’m trying to get it edited as soon as possible so everyone can see it. It will premiere on BurningAngel.com in the near future.” Hey, Joanna, don’t get me wrong, I’m loving your recent Burning Angel efforts (Making the Band and Uber Mistake especially), but this next super-graphic, boundary-pushing porno epic really can’t come soon enough – and I’m not even a fight fan!

Until Ronda ArouseMe sees release via Burning Angel, you’ll find teases and previews all over Joanna and Kleio’s Twitter and Instagram feeds, which is where I found this image, just a little something to send every sport-bra-lover into a state of drooling incoherence. Have fun!

instagram

Mr. Pink’s Weekly Report – August 4th, 2015

mrpinksIt’s August. The weather will soon cool and many us will spend the evenings outside cooking under in the moonlight. Well, I won’t. I’ll be inside exploring the wild world of pornographic entertainment as only Mr. Pink’s can! This week’s slate of brand new porn reviews was an all-transsexual affair as we took a look at the SheMax network and its sites Ladyboy Player, Wild Shemale Orgies, Shemale Tugjobs, and the entire SheMax network itself. How did these taboo-smashing sites fare? Check out the full reviews now and be sure to stop by for a preview of what anal fiend Mike Adriano has in store for ass-men all over this August.

WoodRocket and Rule #34

When was the last time anybody but Axel Braun was so universally celebrated for parodying pop-culture icons in hardcore adult movies? Even some holders of the intellectual properties being parodied admitted first to a curiosity then, an interest, and finally an appreciation of the irreverent super-hero, comic book, TV, and movie-lampooning releases. Well, move on over, Mr. Braun ’cause it looks like your bombastic mega-budget mockbusters could be under threat from the studio that’s proving to be more punk rock than mainstream pop, more Brain Candy than Awakenings, if you will. That studio is WoodRocket.

woodrocket

Founded by Lee Roy Myers, among others, WoodRocket’s bizarre blending of slapstick comedy, pop-culture parody, hardcore porn, and social satire have made it one of the most promising new studios to pop up in some time. Having already pushed porn parodies further than anyone ever thought – SpongeKnob SquareNuts, Sex Toy Story, and even that Jerry-Seinfeld-and-pal-driving-around web series thing, they’ve all been WoodRocket subjects – the studio could have started to focus more on its non-porn webseries James Deen Loves Food and Memes I’d Like to Fuck (see below) or on outlandish projects like a life-size Darth Vader built from sex toys. Parodies have remained an essential part of WoodRocket, though, and we’re now seeing the most courageous and inventive skewering of pop-culture icons since Edward Penishands quietly became a cult comedy hit.

edward penishands

Apparently feeling that squirts and stoners shouldn’t get to have all the cartoonish fun, Myers and company followed up SpongeKnob and Sex Toy Story with Strokemon, the first live-action Pokemon parody starring Rizzo Ford as Dikachu, who’s given a solid working-over by Gash (Tyler Nixon) and Fisty (Kassondra Raine) and just go damn squeals the whole time. Now, I’ll admit to being a bit too long in the tooth to understand the less obvious Pokemon references and jokes, but where the recent Bill and Ted’s SEXcellent Adventure-parodying photoshoot starring Lily Bergman, Jessica Dawn, and Vuko as Bill S. Preston, Esq. and Ted “Theodore” Logan, and the history-spanning cast of influential figures from Lincoln to Beethoven, Genhis Kahn to Joan of Arc is concerned, I’m so on-board it’s ridiculous.

Bill and Ted's SEXcellent Adventure

Whatever your pop-culture fancy, be it Naked Lunch or The Nanny, WoodRocket’s likely to have considered skewering it with sex, proving that just because it made you laugh in your teens doesn’t mean it can’t be masturbation fodder of the highest caliber in your adult years.