Porn | Mr. Pink's Blog - Part 157

Hide Your Girlfriends, It’s the Cuckold King!

Odds are strong that if your girlfriend has seen the work of the world’s most popular jizzlobber, James Deen, in action, she’s quite fond of him. They all are. It’s ridiculous how popular this guy is with the ladies. He’s downright irresistible and he knows it. In fact, he knows it so well he went and shot a movie about it. Behold: James Deen Will Cuckold You!

Whether intended for male porn fans or their ladyfriends, James Deen Will Cuckold You ensures you’ll be feeling a little strange about having just busted a nut to Deen’s fifth turn as director for Evil Angel. After all, the whole premise is based around the boyfriend or husband of a foxy dame being relegated to a humiliating stint on the sofa as Deen pummels his way through the pussies and asses of Amy Brooke, Katie St. Ives, Jaelyn Fox, Presley Maddox, and Tatiana Kush. And, hell, the girls certainly don’t seem to mind giving their fellas the proverbial shaft as they take a more literal one, even going so far as to flip the bird to their angered but cowering loser mates.

Deen is joined in his emasculating endeavors by Sean Michaels, John Strong, DSnooop, and Mr. Pete, among other guys, but it’s still a tad unclear who’ll be joining Deen in diving dick-first in some dude’s sweetie-muffin and who’ll be crying in shame and relegated to the trundle bed.

James Deen Will Cuckold You is set for an October 30 release. You can view promo materials at Evil Angel.

Pornstars Eat 24/7

When you make a living thrashing around on a mattress or sofa until you’re nothing but a spent, sweating heap on the floor, it makes sense that you’d be constantly finding yourself famished at strange times of day. Pornstars are no exception to this rule and actually seem to be embracing their reputation as insatiably hungry women as they embrace a fairly new food delivery service called Eat24.

If the @Eat24 app were a real person, I would sit on its face: http://t.co/2shsby8P7l

— Andy San Dimas! (@andysandimas) August 17, 2013

For its part, Eat24 has done what neither Foodler nor GrubHub managed to: use pornography and pornographers as a notable customer base and part of its marketing campaign. After all, when non-performers are browsing the ‘net in the wee hours of the morning and become inundated with pop-up and banner ads, it’s only the nudie ones that catch their attention. After Eat24 found pornstars tweeting compliments “@Eat24”, spreading the word to their fans, the company’s marketing gurus decided advertising on adult websites would be the most obvious way to spread their new brand far and wide to those who’d likely embrace it: porn fans!

Published on Eat24’s blog, How to Advertise on a Porn Website broke down the company’s reasons for heading into NSFW territory. Infographics abound in the post, giving us laypeople a clear idea of why putting burgers, sushi, and subs on sites like PornHub is a stellar marketing strategy. (And why bananas didn’t make the cut.) The data amassed by Eat24’s researchers brought some curious factoids to light, too. Check out the regional results of polls attempting to discern our nation’s “Horngriest” Cities and Most Sensual Foods, as well as more boring subjects only of interest to designers and marketers, subjects like which banner ads solicited the most click-throughs. (Hint: it was this one.)

Every Man’s Dream is Ferrara’s Reality

Porn fans have ample reason to envy Manuel Ferrara: he’s a four-time winner of AVN’s Male Performer of the Year trophy, has directed over a hundred of acclaimed movies for Evil Angel, Red Light District, and Platinum X Pictures, he’s taken the onscreen anal virginities of Charley Chase and Lexi Belle, and even shot 15 volumes of his no-frills, hotel-set, very realistic hardcore Raw movies. Now, however, ol’ Manny’s about to release a movie that’ll make you wanna castrate this most enviable of men. The title? Manuel Ferrara’s Reverse Gangbang.

Pitting the uncut French superstud up against two teams of six babes – Annika Albrite, Ashley Fires, Dillion Harper, Mischa Brooks, Remy LaCroix, and Riley Reid in the first scene, Bridgette B., Christie Stevens, Christy Mack, Maddy O’Reilly, Raven Bay, and Sheena Shaw – Reverse Gangbang shows a situation undoubtedly in the fantasy spank-bank of most hetero male porn fans. While many guys would be overwhelmed – my teenage self told a friend I could likely only “handle” three women while he stupidly boasted “twenty-five, I reckon” – it’s all in a days work for Ferrara, who described the feature as the “funnest I’ve ever done. The best girls in the industry in two scenes for the luckiest man, me!” he continued, giving fuel to the rumor mill by adding “Can’t wait for the next one!”

Knowing Ferrara, though, and his tendency to hump his partners faster and more vigorously than even the most furiously rutting rabbits, there’s a chance having six women at his fingertips could prove too much even for this seasoned veteran. “Bullshit!” I hear his female fans crying in defense, “Manuel Ferrara can fuck anyone, anything, anytime to roaring success!” Well, then, I guess we’ll just have to shuffle on over to Jules Jordan Video and find out for ourselves, won’t we?

Conjoined Girlfriends Ruffle Feathers

When Huffington Post reports on porn, you know it’s about an issue, a person, or an event that has significant crossover appeal. Imagine my surprise then, when I hit up ol’ HuffPo for the latest audacious gossip involving porn either directly or tangentially only to find a story about, of all things, conjoined-twins-porn. And not real conjoined-twins porn at that, but obviously fake prosthetically-aided lesbian porn from Girlfriends Films.

Starring Mischa Brooks and Rilynn Rae, who at 5’2″ and 5’10” respectively, don’t exactly meet the physical demands of their roles, ‘Conjoined’ is a new hardcore lesbian movie from Girlfriends Films that sees this pair of conjoined twins fall out over love. “One is more lesbian than the other,” director B. Skow told Huffington Post, “but both like girls. They don’t have sex with each other. When one is having sex with another person, they will put a sheet over their sister. Still, the other will feel things that her sister is doing.”

Following Skow’s initial idea of ‘What if one hot conjoined twin fell in love and wanted to be separated?’, Rae and Brooks dove into their unique roles headfirst. “It looks funny when they’re trying to get dressed,” says Skow, “but they are good friends in real life. The film opens with them trying to play Twister.” Twister, really? Oh, super-sexy, humorously conjoined twins, won’t you ever learn?

The Huffington Post piece remained uncharacteristically calm, devoid of the usual harsh and judgmental tone denigrating porn culture, and even managed to provide the release date (albeit a corrected one) for Girlfriends Films’ ‘Conjoined’: November 26th.