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Ain’t Dead Yet: XXX Parodies Still Kicking

Anyone who has sat and watched their favorite show’s entire run with back-to-back episodes in a single Netflix binge will know how devoted we can be to pop-culture in all its forms. Porn parodies, although fading from relevance thanks to more current trends – like the American adult industry and its fans collectively cumming in their trousers the current (and kinda creepy) pseudo-incest craze – are still something of a hot commodity in the adult entertainment world. So much so that Sex.com blogger Chico Dusty has come up with a list of his Top Ten Porn Parodies of 2014 to remind us all that there’s still life left in the old genre yet.

DreamZone Entertainment seems to be coming out on top this year, at least according to Dusty, who ranks The Little Spermaid (dir: Jordan Septo), Cape Fear XXX (dir: Bonnie Rotten), and Rambone XXX: A DreamZone Porn Parody (dir: Septo). Axel Braun hasn’t fallen from his spot as the leading porn parody director and 2014 saw him release Spider-Man XXX 2, Cinderella XXX, and This Ain’t Game of Thrones XXX for Vivid, Wicked, and Hustler respectively. (For Dusty’s complete top ten – what, no love for One Flew Over the Cuckold’s Next, really?)

Although unique entries like Miley May’s first cover feature, the Miley Cyrus-spoofing Molly’s Wrecking Ballz and and Not Jersey Boys XXX (a genuine porn parody musical) made for some interesting viewing, most of the parodies included in Dusty’s list fit the usual bill: superheroes, perverted takes on Disney characters, and two Scorsese movies lampooned in a most lusty style. Fun, sure, but not exactly ground-breaking.

Are porn parodies growing stale or are they gradually getting better, bolder, and more outrageous? Perhaps 2015 will hold the answer, but if Axel Braun’s got anything to say about it it’ll be all spandex sporting sexual spoofs of waning interest to so many porn fans. Is pseudo-incest set to burst into the mainstream the way parodies did a few years back? Will they take over as porn virgins’ first viewings or is something else, something even more risque and tantalizingly taboo on the horizon?

Whatever the case, whether it shuffles off to let pseudo-taboo themes take center-stage or is reinvigorated by new talent and new ideas, 2015 is going to be an interesting year for parody porn.

Check out Adult DVD Empire Unlimited and VideoBox for more Porn Parodies.

Mr. Pink’s Annual Halloween Porn Report: Brazzers’ Dark Reign!

Every year porn studios, sites, and networks clamor to conceive and shoot the most original and most thrilling Halloween porn scene. This year, however, it’s barely even a competition. As outlined in my previous blog, the scant offerings from the pornosphere this year will no doubt leave many looking for a porn site as devoted to Halloween as they themselves are. That site, dear bleeder, is a network: Brazzers.

Having already blogged about Brazzers’ exclusive Halloween series, American Whore Story earlier this month, it’s safe to assume readers and Brazzers fans both do not require an explanation of the (quite frankly idiotic and convoluted) plot. Instead let’s pick up where we left off with episodes four now online and featuring Kleio Valentien in a wild outdoor pussy-pounding by campfire. The climax of the story – you guys care about story, right? – is due for release on October 31st and stars everyone’s favorite queen of decadence, Bonnie Rotten! Finding himself alone with the otherworldly Ms. Rotten, who wears only Japanese shibari bondage ropes, Danny D, on the run from specters and ghouls, heads straight for her asshole and sends her squirting around a hotel room until it’s his turn to explode.

Now, you’d think one five-part series would be enough for Brazzers this Halloween, but the ZZ crew has been pumping out scarily sexy themed episodes since early October. First up was Carter’s Too Old for Trick or Treating, a Teens Like it Big scene starring Carter Cruise, Chanel Preston, and Keiran Lee and sees the young blonde ensnared by by her elders and thoroughly devastated orally, vaginally, and anally after ditching most of her leather outfit.

I’ve heard porn fans refer to Audrey Bitoni as a plasticized doll, but never as the creation of Dr. Frankenslut! A barbaric piecemeal superslut created by the mad scientist, Audrey wakes from her slumber and immediately desires cock. Good thing the doc’s assistant, Mick Blue is around and erect, then.

Spoofing hit movie Paranormal Activity, Brazzers Extra sees the debut of British frizzy-haired ex-mainstream model Aruba Jasmine. With her boyfriend Ryan Rider, Aruba wants to make a sordid sex tape. The spirits inhabiting their house, however, object and make the homemade production a nightmare for the couple. But who’s this other British couple watching Aruba and Ryan try to get it on without the ghosts interrupting, a task at which they ultimately fail. Are they gonna try to fuck, too…?

Released just three days before Halloween, part one of Baby Got Boobs’ World War XXX sees Corinna Blake and her stepbrother Jessy Jones courting their parents outrage by fucking on the sofa. There’s a plague going ’round, though, and it’s headed their way. Will Jessy paint his step-sis’s face before they’re both turned into… whatever the fuck these horrific looking humanoid creatures are! We’ll find out what happens to the fairer of the pair in part two, released October 29, as Corinna, now on the run, encounters fellow post-apocalyptic warrior, Johnny Sins and joins him for some much needed R-and-R (Brazzers-style, of course).

A pair of standalone episodes round out this year’s Halloween offerings from Brazzers, Big Tits in Uniform’s Sexy Halloween and MILFs Like it Big’s Weremilf. The latter scene introduces us to an substantially different Diamond Jackson. When a full moon shines down on her, Ms. Jackson develops an insatiable hunger for human penis. Luckily (for her), she finds Brick Danger nearby and ravenous devours him. Sexy Halloween is a little more sedate, though, and sees Richelle Ryan eager to enjoy her Halloween party as it’s the one night she can dress like an outright sexual deviant and get away with it. That is if “getting away with it” includes being pulled from her barely-there prison stripes and fucked hard by Mick Blue.

Be sure to eat something more nutritious than a bucketload of candy when you’re celebrating spooks and specters this year. With all this incredible seasonal smut from Brazzers, you’re gonna need to be in peak condition to, uh, “enjoy” them all before Thanksgiving arrives.

Sincerely, from all of us at Mr. Pink’s, have a killer Halloween, Samhain, Allhallowtide, All Hallows’ Eve, All Saint’s Day, Totensonntag, Hop-tu-Naa, Calan Gaeaf, Allantide, Dia de los Muertos, Reformation Day, or whatever-the-fuck esoteric feast or festival you choose to celebrate come October’s end.

American Whore Story, ZZ-Style

Brazzers isn’t the kind of porn company to embark on any new venture with cautious reserve, so with Halloween on the horizon it was expected that the ZZ would throw its ample weight behind a unique celebration. This year it’s American Whore Story.

American Whore Story is a multi-chapter epic from Brazzers that sees pornstars Katrina Jade, Bonnie Rotten, Skin Diamond and Julez Ventura tackle horrific, treacherous situations all in the name of sexual adventure. Ably abetted by everyone’s favorite expressively-eyebrowed male star Tommy Pistol, insanely-well-endowed Brit Danny D, and All-American boy-next-door Tyler Nixon (at least in the first three chapters), the carnally obsessed cast get to filling every available orifice regardless of the precarious situations surrounding them. In American Whore Story’s first chapter (published last week at ZZ Series), Katrina Jade flags down travelers Tyler and Danny and successfully distracts Tyler from his original goal: locating a secret grave-site that held a mass of partial human remains. When she turns down the motel room light to get some post-coital zees, Katrina is terrified (as she should be) by someone at her bedroom door.

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Part two of this Brazzers Halloween horror series sees Danny continue his ghost hunt alone, roping motel employee Julez Ventura (who’s angling for a joint) into helping him locate his now-missing pal. Then, seemingly out of nowhere, he stumbles upon a bound and hooded Skin Diamond, wrapped in leather and placed on an altar. Freeing her, Danny is greeted by Diamond with a hysterical laughing fit before Ventura joins them, masked and cowled, and seduces our hapless hero into a metaphysical threesome that leaves him disoriented and confused when they vanish into a puff of smoke after draining him. But who’s that mysterious dark-haired man seen in security footage walking the area with the missing Tyler and what does he want with our fellas?

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Bonnie Rotten, arguably the most beloved hyper-sexual and endlessly elastic deviant in porn today, takes center stage for the third chapter of Brazzers’ American Whore Story (due for release October 21st) but whether she provides any answers or simply poses more questions remains to be seen. Joining forces with the apparent mastermind behind all this insanity (that’d be Mr. Pistol), Rotten takes a railing in all three holes. But what exactly is her involvement and what has happened to Katrina Jade and Tyler Nixon to leave Danny D so ill-at-ease? Hop along, little pumpkins, to Brazzers site ZZ Series to catch the unfolding of this particular pornographic horror story as can only be told by adult entertainment’s most notoriously epic studio.

James Deen Keeps on Sinnin’

Last week, we ran through the first four installments of James Deen’s soon-to-be legendary feature series, James Deen’s 7 Sins: Greed, Gluttony, Lust, and Pride. Now that the final installment, Wrath, has premiered on JamesDeen.com, it’s time to wrap up this whole sordid affair before I send myself straight to the Netherworld for what I’ve seen and written.

ENVY, the fifth feature in the series, details the downward spiral of pornstar Chanel Preston, whose obsession with Deen and his nubile ladyfriend Chloe Foster progresses from voyeurism to poisoning, kidnapping, and rape. After her husband ignores her advances, Preston ropes Foster into fluffing her waiting crew of gangbangers, preparing them for an airtight three-guy plug-fest that leaves Preston satisfied and Foster humiliated.

SLOTH sees Lia Lor attempting to brush her teeth after a tryst with Deen, only to find his water’s been cut off. She wades through a messy floor to join Deen, slumped on the sofa in his pajamas, and attempts to rouse him with a blowjob. Due to her partner’s disinterest, Lor’s imagination conjures up two distinct threesomes and fantasizes about another man pounding her as she rests on Deen’s lap. Only, this fantasy doesn’t seem particularly enjoyable. In fact, so heavy and dour mood in the apartment that Lor ups and leaves for something a bit brighter.

Deen’s final installment, WRATH, is the most furiously sordid of them all. With a shaven head that makes him look like a death row inmate Deen beats the crap out of Danny Wylde then tears through a gauntlet of naked female figures (many of them from porn’s current generation of supersluts), aggressively dominating each one as she comes into reach. Slamming them against the wall by the neck, slapping faces and tits, choking and suffocating them, Deen even goes so far as to pick one blonde up by inserting his fingers between her lower lips and lifting. After treating himself to all nine women over the feature’s three scenes, Deen, who’s as much a cinematic adventurer as he is a sexual one, has accomplished something truly remarkable. A seven-feature hardcore porn series that owes as much to the film work of Gordon Willis and Gaspar Noe as it does to Deen’s distributor John Stagliano and his Evil Angel empire. How ever will he top James Deen’s 7 Sins?

Oh, and if you’re eager to see Deen’s treatise on sexual sin, you can do so at his official website, which throughout October will donate 50% of all profits to cancer research, prevention, and treatment.