Sex Toys | Mr. Pink's Blog

Fucking Punks!

Earlier this week, Mr. Pink’s took a wander through the Burning Angel network in preparation for a slew of new reviews of Joanna and crew’s fantastic punk rock porn sites. The first to receive the full Pink treatment was POV Punx, a site devoted entirely to thrusting you in the virtual hot seat and providing drool-worthy views of Kylee Kross, Misti Dawn, Kleio Valentein and other Burning Angels in scenes of face, snatch, and ass-fucking awesomeness.

Those of you who’ve been paying special attention to recent trends would’ve surely noticed the increased presence of “alternative” girls in porn both softcore and hardcore, on sites like Suicide Girls and God’s Girls, all over the Tumblr-verse, and even on relatively mainstream adult sites like Brazzers and Bang Bros. While Burning Angel is obviously the place to go for hardcore pornstars with tattoos, piercings, and absurdly colored hair, and POV Punx offers as intimate an experience with such girls as the Internet is currently capable of, those who want something a bit more tangible can turn to Nasstoys and its newest male sexual aid products.

FukPussy Pierced Nipples and FukPussy Pierced Vagina might seem like fairly bizarre objects to sink your shaft into but when you consider that they allegedly feel “better than real REALSKIN” and include a push-button bullet vibrator to offer vibrating orgasms, fucking a pierced pile of anatomically inaccurate flesh-colored thermoplastic rubber doesn’t seem like such a bad idea; and, hey, used in conjunction with POV Punx, the FukPussy might have you convinced you’ve just bagged yourself some real goth-punk pussy.

How Does Lindsay Lohan Feel?

Professional tabloid fodder, Lindsay Lohan has finally accepted Playboy Magazine’s long-standing offer of a nude pictorial. When originally asked a few years back, just as her star was beginning to wane, Lohan had yet to bare her breasts onscreen or in print and, feeling she risked losing some credibility, was reported asking for a cool million to get her gear off for Hugh Hefner’s infamous publication. Now, after numerous run-ins with the law and trouble with addictive substances, as well as already revealing her breasts in artsy-fartsy photospreads in New York Magazine and Harper’s, it seems Lohan is just desperate enough to finally accept Playboy’s offer – and for a little less than her demanded $1 million, too. Lohan’s equally controversial mother, Dina Lohan, has reportedly confirmed that the shoot has taken place and that it was “tasteful.” Bummer.

After hearing the news of Loco LiLo’s plans with Playboy, Fleshlight, the makers of the world’s most popular male sex toy, have thrown the troubled star a proverbial bone. Like pornstars Stoya, Jenna Haze, and Jesse Jane before her, Lindsay could be the next Fleshlight girl if only she’d agree to have moulds made of her vagina, anus, or mouth. Steve Shubin, CEO of Fleshlight has offered her the $1 million she failed to get from Playboy in exchange for her services and likeness, saying “This is a perfect way for Lindsay to immortalize her body parts and it allows fans to connect with her in a whole new way.”

Anyone else think that if LiLo suffers a few more legal troubles Dina just might push her in Fleshlight’s direction?

Lindsay Lohan is set to appear in Playboy’s January 2012 issue, on sale in December. The Fleshlight, it seems, will have to wait.

Sex Toys for Boys… and Girls, too!

It’s fair to say that women usually reap the benefits of advancements in the sexual aid industry. Pornography, most of which is clearly targeted to an exclusively male audience, aside, the majority of high selling toys, aids, and novelties focus on providing increased pleasure for women. Until recently, men have had to be content with using their own two hands or a soft plastic sheath to attain heightened sexual pleasure. With the release of Ntimate Inc.’s “male pleasure system”, FleshWrap, the limits of your potential sexual pleasure may have increased ten fold. That is, of course, if you don’t mind pulling your balls away from your shaft and trapping them in this distant position with a vice-like metal bar/plastic ring apparatus; or, as Ntimate put it, “gently stretch[ing] the scrotum forward and lift[ing] the testicles upward.”

Women, of course, aren’t being neglected, as the FleshWrap claims to increase their pleasure during intercourse by helping your testicles and scrotum rub against your partner with every stroke. As intriguing as the FleshWrap might sound to a woman, who wants to let you girlfriend literally trap your balls in a vice? If you’re think mostly of her, you do have a few other innovations to try out.

After causing a minor sensation at AVN’s Adult Novelty Expo back in January, but only now being made available to the public, the revolutionary Ola vibrator from Minna Life is already making substantial waves in the female pleasure market. The vibrator, which features a groundbreaking interface that enable the wielder to control vibrational patterns by varying the pressure of her grip on the innovative touch-sensitive handle, may cost a whopping $165, but who can put a price on sexual satisfaction?

For those ladies with less money to throw around but a delightfully sinful desire for a new toy to mess with, there’s always Hustler Toys’ new Devilish Darling. This 8-inch waterproof silicone vibe, available in red and white, is embossed with devil horns and hearts and joins, just in time for Halloween, such carnal curiosities as Hustler’s metallic studded Disco Stick and Dia de los Muertos-themed Scandalous Skull vibrators, and costs a more affordable $67.95.

As for the FleshWrap… I’m game. Which is to say, Mr. Pink’s certainly wouldn’t turn down a complimentary Ntimate FleshWrap, for review purposes, of course. Thanks in advance Ntimate!

Ahem.

Stripping Down for Halloween

When Halloween rolls around every year, it seems a few groups of concerned citizens, often teachers and parents, are outraged at how provocative the retail costume industry has become. The once chaste versions of characters from Alice in Wonderland, Wizard of Oz, and Red Riding Hood have now been adopted and adapted by adult women. Complete with cleavage-baring corsets, garter belts, and frilled, visible panties, these “adult” costumes are sure to turn heads at parties and Halloween street parades.

Keeping its focus firmly in the over-18 realm, Los Angeles-based “contemporary costume and lingerie” design firm, Seven ‘til Midnight launched its new line dubbed ‘Costume or Play – Wear Either Way.’ Taking traditional Halloween costumes that have been reserved for adults – pirates, nurses, sex kittens, and the French maid – and putting an even more salacious twist on them, Seven ‘til Midnight has designed tear-away adaptable outfits that can be put to use in public or private, as costume or playful lingerie. Though there’s no doubt some wearers will choose the more revealing option when heading out this October, there’s going to be some pretty damn lively bedroom parties this year, that’s for sure.